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NVC suggests behind every action, however ineffective, tragic, violent, or abhorrent to us, is an attempt to meet a need.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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The most dangerous of all behaviors may consist of doing things 'because we're supposed to.
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It's never what people do that makes us angry it's what we tell ourselves about what they did.
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As radical as it may seem, it is possible to do things only out of play. I believe that to the degree that we engage moment by moment in the playfulness of enriching life- motivated solely by the desire for its enrichment- to that degree are we being compassionate with ourselves.
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Remember that whatever anyone does, it is an effort to meet a need.
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To be able to hear our own feelings and needs and to empathize with them can free us from depression.
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Our goal is to create a quality of empathic connection that allows everyone's needs to be met.
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Time and again, people transcend the paralyzing effects of psychological pain when they have sufficient contact with someone who can hear them empathically.
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As long as I think I 'should' do it, I'll resist it, even if I want very much to do it.
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Get very clear about the kind of world we would like and then start living that way.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I believe that the most joyful and intrinsic motivation human beings have for taking any action is the desire to meet our needs and the needs of others.
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We want to take action out of the desire to contribute to life rather than out of fear, guilt, shame, or obligation.
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Not getting our needs fulfilled is painful - but it's a sweet pain, not suffering, which is what comes from life-alienated thinking and interpretation.
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Empathy: Emptying our mind and listening with our whole being
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There are the two main reasons we don't get our needs met. First, we don't know how to express our needs to begin with and second if we do, we forget to put a clear request after it, or we use vague words like appreciate, listen, recognize, know, be real, and stuff like that.
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If the other persons behavior is not in harmony with my own needs, the more I empathize with them and their needs, the more likely I am to get me own needs met.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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What others do may be the stimulus of our feelings, but never the cause.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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The only time a message (label) can scare us is if we think there is such a thing, and that such a thing is a disgrace.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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NVC helps us connect with each other and ourselves in a way that allows our natural compassion to flourish.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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If we ask two questions, we will see that punishment never works. First: What do we want the other person to do? Second: What do we want the other person's reasons to be for doing as we request?
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I find that my cultural conditioning leads me to focus attention on places where I am unlikely to get what I want. I developed NVC as a way to train my attention-to shine the light of consciousness-on places that have the potential to yield what I am seeking.
Marshall B. Rosenberg