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When people hear needs, it provokes compassion. When people hear diagnoses, it provokes defensiveness and attack.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Marshall B. Rosenberg
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg
The most important use of NVC may be in developing self-compassion.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
Some people use NVC to respond compassionately to themselves, some to create greater depth in their personal relationships, and still others to build effective relationships at work or in the political arena. Worldwide, NVC is used to mediate disputes and conflicts at all levels.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
We are this divine energy. It's not something we have to attain. We just have to realize it, to be present to it.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
Four D's of Disconnection: 1. Diagnosis (judgment, analysis, criticism, comparison) 2. Denial of Responsibility 3. Demand 4. 'Deserve' oriented language.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
Anger is a signal that you're distracted by judgmental or punitive thinking, and that some precious need of yours is being ignored.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
We need empathy to give empathy.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
A need is life seeking expression within us.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
My anger tells me firstly that there's a need of mine that's not getting met.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
I find that my cultural conditioning leads me to focus attention on places where I am unlikely to get what I want. I developed NVC as a way to train my attention-to shine the light of consciousness-on places that have the potential to yield what I am seeking.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
Labeling and diagnosis is a catastrophic way to communicate. Telling other people what's wrong with them greatly reduces, almost to zero, the probability that we're going to get what we're after.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
Understanding the other persons' needs does not mean you have to give up on your own needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
I try never to hear what another person thinks of me. I enjoy life a lot more when I spend as little time as possible hearing or thinking about what other people think about me. I go to the needs behind the thoughts. Then I'm in a different world.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
Life-Enriching Education: an education that prepares children to learn throughout their lives, relate well to others, and themselves, be creative, flexible, and venturesome, and have empathy not only for their immediate kin but for all of humankind.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
The number one rule of our training is empathy before education.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
NVC helps us connect with each other and ourselves in a way that allows our natural compassion to flourish.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
The objective of Nonviolent Communication is not to change people and their behavior in order to get our way: it is to establish relationships based on honesty and empathy, which will eventually fulfill everyone's needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
Clinical training in psychoanalysis has a deficit. It teaches how to sit and think about what a person is saying and how to interpret it intellectually, but not how to be fully present to this person.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
I think that there is a problem with rewards and consequences because in the long run, they rarely work in the ways we hope. In fact, they are likely to backfire.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
By maintaining our attention on what's going on within others, we offer them a chance to fully explore and express their interior selves. We would stem this flow if we were to shift attention too quickly either to their request or to our own desire to express ourselves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
Nonviolent Communication is a way of keeping our consciousness tuned in moment by moment to that beauty within ourselves and others, and not saying anything that we think might in any way tarnish people's consciousness of their own beauty.
Marshall B. Rosenberg