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We can never make anyone do anything against their will without enormous consequences.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Marshall B. Rosenberg
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg
Needs are the expression of life through us.
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People have been trained to criticize, insult, and otherwise communicate in ways that create distance among people.
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Empathy: Emptying our mind and listening with our whole being
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It's never what people do that makes us angry it's what we tell ourselves about what they did.
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Getting in touch with unmet needs is important to the healing process.
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In our culture, most of us have been trained to ignore our own wants and to discount our needs.
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Classifying and judging people promotes violence.
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Labeling and diagnosis is a catastrophic way to communicate. Telling other people what's wrong with them greatly reduces, almost to zero, the probability that we're going to get what we're after.
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The most dangerous of all behaviors may consist of doing things 'because we're supposed to.
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Our ability to offer empathy can allow us to stay vulnerable, defuse potential violence, help us hear the word 'no' without taking it as a rejection, revive lifeless conversation, and even hear the feelings and needs expressed through silence.
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Everything we do is in service of our needs. When this one concept is applied to our view of others, we'll see that we have no real enemies, that what others do to us is the best possible thing they know to do to get their needs met.
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How I choose to look at any situation will greatly affect whether I have the power to change it or make matters worse.
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When I am angry I have a judgment and an unmet need.
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Staying with empathy we allow speakers to touch deeper levels of themselves.
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As radical as it may seem, it is possible to do things only out of play. I believe that to the degree that we engage moment by moment in the playfulness of enriching life- motivated solely by the desire for its enrichment- to that degree are we being compassionate with ourselves.
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We want people to change because they see better ways of meeting their needs at less cost, not because of fear that we're going to punish them, or 'guilt' them if they don't. This applies to ourselves as well.
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Don't hate the circumstance, you may miss the blessing
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Fear of corporal punishment obscures children's awareness of the compassion underlying the parent's demands.
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Intellectual understanding blocks empathy.
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Expressing our vulnerability can help resolve conflicts.
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