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When we focus on clarifying what is being observed, felt, and needed rather than on diagnosing and judging, we discover the depth of our own compassion.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
Compassion
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Interpretations, criticisms, diagnoses, and judgments of others are actually alienated expressions of our unmet needs.
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Any time you throw pain at a Jackal without a clear present request, within a millisecond he'll jump in.
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The most important use of NVC may be in developing self-compassion.
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We are responsible for what we hear other people say and for how we act.
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When we listen for feelings and needs - we can see that people who seem like monsters are simply human beings whose language and behavior sometimes keep us from seeing their humanness.
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Getting in touch with unmet needs is important to the healing process.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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If you are a jackal, you will try to reassure. Jackals try to fix people in pain. They can't stand pain, but make matters worse by trying to get rid of it. Put on giraffe ears. Try to hear what they are feeling and needing.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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The objective of Nonviolent Communication is not to change people and their behavior in order to get our way: it is to establish relationships based on honesty and empathy, which will eventually fulfill everyone's needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Nonviolent Communication is a way of keeping our consciousness tuned in moment by moment to that beauty within ourselves and others, and not saying anything that we think might in any way tarnish people's consciousness of their own beauty.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Anger is a signal that you're distracted by judgmental or punitive thinking, and that some precious need of yours is being ignored.
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Imagine connecting with the human spirit in each person in any situation at any time. Imagine interacting with others in a way that allows everyone's need to be equally valued. Imagine creating organizations and life-serving systems responsive to our needs and the needs of our environment.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Every criticism, judgment, diagnosis, and expression of anger is the tragic expression of an unmet need.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Labeling and diagnosis is a catastrophic way to communicate. Telling other people what's wrong with them greatly reduces, almost to zero, the probability that we're going to get what we're after.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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By maintaining our attention on what's going on within others, we offer them a chance to fully explore and express their interior selves. We would stem this flow if we were to shift attention too quickly either to their request or to our own desire to express ourselves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Everything we do is in service of our needs. When this one concept is applied to our view of others, we'll see that we have no real enemies, that what others do to us is the best possible thing they know to do to get their needs met.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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The number one rule of our training is empathy before education.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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All that has been integrated into NVC has been known for centuries about consciousness, language, communication skills, and use of power that enable us to maintain a perspective of empathy for ourselves and others, even under trying conditions.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Self-empathy in NVC means checking in with your own feelings and needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I think that there is a problem with rewards and consequences because in the long run, they rarely work in the ways we hope. In fact, they are likely to backfire.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When we are angry, killing people is too superficial.
Marshall B. Rosenberg