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It's never what people do that makes us angry it's what we tell ourselves about what they did.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Learning is too precious to be motivated by coercive tactics.
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We use NVC to evaluate ourselves in ways that engender growth rather than self-hatred.
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Not getting our needs fulfilled is painful - but it's a sweet pain, not suffering, which is what comes from life-alienated thinking and interpretation.
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When you need empathy, you cannot give empathy.
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Four D's of Disconnection: 1. Diagnosis (judgment, analysis, criticism, comparison) 2. Denial of Responsibility 3. Demand 4. 'Deserve' oriented language.
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Staying with empathy we allow speakers to touch deeper levels of themselves.
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NVC is founded on language and communication skills that strengthen our ability to remain human, even under trying conditions.
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All people ever say is: THANK YOU (a celebration of life) and PLEASE (an opportunity to make life more wonderful).
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When we are angry, killing people is too superficial.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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By maintaining our attention on what's going on within others, we offer them a chance to fully explore and express their interior selves. We would stem this flow if we were to shift attention too quickly either to their request or to our own desire to express ourselves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Our goal is to create a quality of empathic connection that allows everyone's needs to be met.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I have tried to integrate the spirituality into the training in a way that meets my need not to destroy the beauty of it through abstract philosophizing.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Compliments and praise, for their part, are tragic expressions of fulfilled needs
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Whether I praise or criticize someone's action, I imply that I am their judge, that I'm engaged in rating them or what they have done.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Punishment also includes judgmental labeling and the withholding of privileges.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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To practice NVC, it's critical for me to be able to slow down, take my time, to come from an energy I choose, the one I believe that we were meant to come from, not the one I was programmed into.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When we listen for feelings and needs - we can see that people who seem like monsters are simply human beings whose language and behavior sometimes keep us from seeing their humanness.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Get very clear about the kind of world we would like and then start living that way.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We are compassionate with ourselves when we are able to embrace all parts of ourselves and recognize the needs and values expressed by each part.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Judgments of others contribute to self-fulfilling prophecies.
Marshall B. Rosenberg