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Twenty-four years ago I was strangely handsome in San Francisco in the rainy season I was often mistaken for fair weather.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Years
Twenty
Weather
Twenties
Strangely
Fairs
Rainy
Seasons
Francisco
Fair
Handsome
Four
Mistaken
Often
Season

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The only people who should use the possessive 'we' are kings, newspaper editors, and persons with tapeworms.
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We despise all reverences and all objects of reverence which are outside the pale of our list of sacred things. And yet, with strange inconsistency, we are shocked when other people despise and defile the things which are holy to us.
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We all live in the protection of certain cowardices which we call our principles.
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One is apt to overestimate beauty when it is rare
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Education is what remains when what is learned has been taken away.
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I am living a new and exalted life of late. It steeps me in a sacred rapture to see a portrait develop and take soul under my hand. First, I throw off a study - just a mere study, a few apparently random lines - and to look at it you would hardly ever suspect who it was going to be even I cannot tell, myself.
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The rain ...falls upon the just and the unjust alike a thing which would not happen if I were superintending the rain's affairs. No, I would rain softly and sweetly on the just, but if I caught a sample of the unjust outdoors, I would drown him.
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Biographies are but the clothes and buttons of the man. The biography of the man himself cannot be written.
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There are people who think that honesty is always the best policy. This is a superstition. There are times when the appearance of it is worth six of it.
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All the territorial possessions of all the political establishments in the earth--including America, of course-- consist of pilferings from other people's wash. No tribe, howsoever insignificant, and no nation, howsoever mighty occupies a foot of land that was not stolen.
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I said nothing of the sort.
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It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's manners, but drowning would help.
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When the time comes that a man has had his dinner, then the true man comes to the surface
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I hope all of us may eventually be together in everlasting peace and bliss -- except the inventor of the # telephone .
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Concentration of power in a political machine is bad and an Established Church is only a political machine it was invented for that it is nursed, cradled, preserved for that it is an enemy to human liberty, and does no good which it could not better do in a split-up and scattered condition.
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When an honest writer discovers an imposition it is his simple duty to strip it bare and hurl it down from its place of honor, no matter who suffers by it any other course would render him unworthy of the public confidence.
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Grown people everywhere are always likely to cling to the religion they were brought up in.
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I have a religion-but you will call it blasphemy. It is that there is a God for the rich man but none for the poor.....Perhaps your religion will sustain you,will feed you-I place no dependence in mine. Our religions are alike, though, in one respect-neither can make a man happy when he is out of luck.
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It is better to give than receive- especially advice.
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Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.
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