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Most of the things I worried about in life never happened.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Worried
Happened
Things
Never
Life
More quotes by Mark Twain
Love is an irreresisistible desire to be irresistibily desired.
Mark Twain
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
Mark Twain
It's spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you've got it, you want—oh, you don't quite know what it is you do want, but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so!
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There is no character, howsoever good and fine, but it can be destroyed by ridicule, howsoever poor and witless.
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The heart is the real fountain of youth.
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There is this trouble about special providences namely, there is so often a doubt as to which party was intended to be the beneficiary. In the case of the children, the bears, and the prophet, the bears got more real satisfaction out of the episode than the prophet did, because they got the children.
Mark Twain
I'm pushing 60 years of age...and that's enough exercise for me.
Mark Twain
God cures and the doctor sends the bill.
Mark Twain
Those who do not read have no advantage over those who cannot read.
Mark Twain
The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow.
Mark Twain
Well, Ben Rogers, if I was as ignorant as you I wouldn't let on.
Mark Twain
I never write metropolis for seven cents when I can write city and get paid the same.
Mark Twain
Some of us cannot be optimists, but all of us can be bigamists
Mark Twain
... No photograph ever was good, yet, of anybody - hunger and thirst and utter wretchedness overtake the outlaw who invented it! It transforms into desperadoes the weakest of men depicts sinless innocence upon the pictured faces of ruffians gives the wise man the stupid leer of a fool, and the fool an expression of more than earthly wisdom.
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Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
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There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can.
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I have not professionally dealt in truth. Many when they come to die have spent all the truth that was in them, and enter the next world as paupers. I have saved up enough to make an astonishment there.
Mark Twain
Among other common lies, we have the silent lie - the deception which one conveys by simply keeping still and concealing the truth. Many obstinate truth-mongers indulge in this dissipation, imagining that if they speak no lie, they lie not at all.
Mark Twain
If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go.
Mark Twain
Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
Mark Twain
