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If you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Misinformed
Uninformed
Newspaper
Newspapers
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More quotes by Mark Twain
Never miss an opportunity to shut up.
Mark Twain
Duties are not performed for duty's sake, but because their neglect would make the man uncomfortable. A man performs but one duty - the duty of contenting his spirit, the duty of making himself agreeable to himself.
Mark Twain
There are no accidents, all things have a deep and calculated purpose sometimes the methods employed by Providence seem strange and incongruous, but we have only to be patient and wait for the result: then we recognize that no others would have answered the purpose, and we are rebuked and humbled.
Mark Twain
Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are most economical in its use.
Mark Twain
A little starvation can really do more for the average sick man than can the best medicines and the best doctors.
Mark Twain
In other localities certain places in the streams are much better than others, but at Niagara one place is just as good as another, for the reason that the fish do not bite anywhere.
Mark Twain
One must keep one's character. Earn a character first if you can, and if you can't, then assume one.
Mark Twain
A man who keeps company with glaciers comes to feel tolerably insignificiant by and by. The Alps and the glaciers together are able to take every bit of conceit out of a man and reduce his self-importance to zero if he will only remain within the influence of their sublime presence long enough to give it a fair and reasonable chance to do its work.
Mark Twain
You may honestly feel grateful that homeopathy survived the attempts of the allopaths (orthodoxy) to destroy it.
Mark Twain
I am not interested to know whether vivisection produces results that are profitable to the human race or doesn't...The pain which it inflicts upon unconsenting animals is the basis of my enmity toward it, and it is to me sufficient justification of the enmity without looking further.
Mark Twain
People are much more willing to lend you books than bookcases.
Mark Twain
An American has not seen the United States until he has seen Mardi-Gras in New Orleans.
Mark Twain
Those who say truth is stranger than fiction have wasted their time on poorly written fiction.
Mark Twain
We write frankly and freely, but then we modify before we print.
Mark Twain
My own luck has been curious all my literary life I never could tell a lie that anyone would doubt, nor a truth that anybody would believe.
Mark Twain
I could be an idiot, or I can serve in Congress, but I repeat myself.
Mark Twain
You can't pray a lie -- I found that out.
Mark Twain
There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can.
Mark Twain
Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven.
Mark Twain
The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture he will never get a set which can really be depended on 'till a dentist makes him one.
Mark Twain