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God rewards gamblers and fools. The crucial thing, when you win, is knowing which you were.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Fools
Crucial
Rewards
Fool
Knowing
Winning
Thing
Gamblers
More quotes by Mark Twain
Plain question and plain answer make the shortest road out of most perplexities.
Mark Twain
The only certainties in life are death and taxes.
Mark Twain
I like Joan of Arc best of all my books and it is the best I know it perfectly well.
Mark Twain
Don't go to sleep, so many people die there.
Mark Twain
Damn these human beings if I had invented them I would go hide my head in a bag.
Mark Twain
The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture he will never get a set which can really be depended on 'till a dentist makes him one.
Mark Twain
When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels eat.
Mark Twain
The North thinks it knows how to make corn bread, but this is a gross superstition. Perhaps no bread in the world is quite as good as Southern corn bread, and perhaps no bread in the world is quite as bad as the Northern imitation of it.
Mark Twain
Nature knows no indecencies man invents them.
Mark Twain
The humorous story is told gravely the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.
Mark Twain
We are called the nation of inventors. And we are. We could still claim that title and wear its loftiest honors if we had stopped with the first thing we ever invented, which was human liberty.
Mark Twain
I said there was but one solitary thing about the past worth remembering, and that was the fact that it is past-can't be restored.
Mark Twain
The master minds of all nations, in all ages, have sprung in affluent multitude from the mass of the nations, and from the mass of the nation only-not from its privileged classes.
Mark Twain
There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus and upset the convictions and debauch the emotions of an audience not practiced in the tricks and delusions of oratory
Mark Twain
Laws are sand, customs are rock. Laws can be evaded and punishment escaped, but an openly transgressed custom brings sure punishment.
Mark Twain
That is a simple rule, and easy to remember. When I, a thoughtful and unblessed Presbyterian, examine the Koran, I know that beyond any question every Mohammedan is insane not in all things, but in religious matters.
Mark Twain
A sense of humor is the one thing no one will admit to not having.
Mark Twain
It is easier to stay out than get out.
Mark Twain
Figures often beguile me, particularly when I have the arranging of them myself in which case the remark attributed to Disraeli would often apply with justice and force: There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
Mark Twain
The altar cloth of one aeon is the doormat of the next.
Mark Twain
