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None but an ass pays a compliment and asks a favour at the same time. There are many asses.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
None
Pay
Asks
Asses
Many
Favour
Time
Pays
Compliment
Ass

More quotes by Mark Twain

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In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.
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I like the truth sometimes, but I don't care enough for it to hanker after it.
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You can't pray a lie -- I found that out.
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If you can't get a compliment any other way, pay yourself one.
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We are all alike, on the inside.
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All saints can do miracles, but few of them can keep a hotel.
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Never refuse to do a kindness unless the act would work great injury to yourself, and never refuse to take a drink - under any circumstances.
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College is a place where a professor's lecture notes go straight to the students' lecture notes, without passing through the brains of either.
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Names are not always what they seem. The common Welsh name Bzjxxllwcp is pronounced Jackson.
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We have to keep our God placated with prayer, and even then we are never sure of him-how much higher and finer is the Indian's God...Our illogical God is all-powerful in name, but impotent in fact the Great Spirit is not all-powerful, but does the very best he can for his injun and does it free of charge
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Honest poverty is a gem that even a king might be proud to call his own - but I wish to sell out
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A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.
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Experience, the only logic sure to convince a diseased imagination and restore it to rugged health.
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Is the human race a joke? Was it devised and patched together in a dull time when there was nothing important to do?
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The law of work seems unfair, but nothing can change it the more enjoyment you get out of your work, the more money you will make.
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Jesus died to save men - a small thing for an immortal to do - and didn't save many, anyway. But if he had been damned for the race, that would have been act of a size proper to a god, and would have saved the whole race.
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The low level which commercial morality has reached in America is deplorable. We have humble God fearing Christian men among us who will stoop to do things for a million dollars that they ought not to be willing to do for less than 2 millions.
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It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
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Rags, wretchedness, poverty and dirt, those signs and symbols that indicate the presence of [Muslim] rule more surely than the crescent-flag itself, abound.
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The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
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