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Do good when you can, and charge when you think they will stand it.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Think
Thinking
Charge
Stand
Good
More quotes by Mark Twain
It was enough to make a body ashamed of the human race.
Mark Twain
It is my custom to keep on talking until I get the audience cowed.
Mark Twain
Don't wrestle with pigs. You both get dirty and the pig likes it.
Mark Twain
Travel has no longer any charm for me. I have seen all the foreign countries I want to except heaven & hell & I have only a vague curiosity about one of those.
Mark Twain
Humor is the great thing, the saving thing after all. The minute it crops up, all our hardnesses yield, all our irritations, and resentments flit away, and a sunny spirit takes their place.
Mark Twain
There is a great difference between feeding parties to wild beasts and stirring up their finer feelings in an inquisition. One is the system of degraded barbarians, the other of enlightened civilized people.
Mark Twain
If we only had some God in the country's laws, instead of being in such a sweat to get him into the Constitution, it would be better all around.
Mark Twain
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
Mark Twain
What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
Mark Twain
In God We Trust. It is the choicest compliment that has ever been paid us, and the most gratifying to our feelings. It is simple, direct, gracefully phrased it always sounds well - In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true.
Mark Twain
I felt it was my duty to praise all of God's works with fervent enthusiasm. At the same time I killed flies in my house in a spirit of hatred, exasperation and contempt. My praise to God for all his works was dishonest, the act of killing the fly was honest.
Mark Twain
How slow and still the time did drag along.
Mark Twain
One compliment can keep me going for a whole month.
Mark Twain
Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.
Mark Twain
Some of us cannot be optimists, but all of us can be bigamists
Mark Twain
Never do wrong when people are looking.
Mark Twain
No man that has ever lived has done a thing to please God--primarily. It was done to please himself, then God next.
Mark Twain
Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.
Mark Twain
Is the human race a joke? Was it devised and patched together in a dull time when there was nothing important to do?
Mark Twain
When there was room on the ledge outside of the pots and boxes for a cat, the cat was there- in sunny weather- stretched at full length, asleep and blissful, with her furry belly to the sun and a paw curved over her nose.
Mark Twain
