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Half of the results of a good intentions are evil half the results of an evil intention are good.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Intention
Results
Half
Evil
Good
Intentions

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A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.
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The less a man knows the bigger the noise he makes and the higher the salary he commands.
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Ignorant people think it is the noise which fighting cats make that is so aggravating, but it ain't so it is the sickening grammar that they use.
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I have spent most of my life worrying about things that have never happened.
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It is easier to stay out than get out.
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I have tried getting up early, and I have tried getting up late-and the latter agrees with me best.
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Names are not always what they seem. The common Welsh name Bzjxxllwcp is pronounced Jackson.
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Often a quite assified remark becomes sanctified by use and petrified by custom it is then a permanency, its term of activity a geologic period.
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It's an epitome of life. The first half of it consists of the capacity to enjoy without the chance the last half consists of the chance without the capacity.
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Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from making bad decisions.
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I was dead for millions of years before I was born and it never inconvenienced me a bit.
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The calamity that comes is never the one we had prepared ourselves for.
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The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad.
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My advice to girls: first, don't smoke - to excess second, don't drink - to excess third, don't marry - to excess.
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Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse.
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There are no accidents, all things have a deep and calculated purpose sometimes the methods employed by Providence seem strange and incongruous, but we have only to be patient and wait for the result: then we recognize that no others would have answered the purpose, and we are rebuked and humbled.
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It is easy to find fault, if one has that disposition. There was once a man who, not being able to find any other fault with his coal, complained that there were too many prehistoric toads in it.
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Choosing not to read is like closing an open door to paradise
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One learns peoples through the heart, not the eyes or the intellect.
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A jay hasnt got any more principle than a Congressman. A jay will lie, a jay will steal, a jay will deceive, a jay will betray and four times out of five, a jay will go back on his solemnest promise.
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