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Seasickness: at first you are so sick you are afraid you will die, and then you are so sick you are afraid you won't die.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Seasickness
Sick
Afraid
Dies
Firsts
First

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To me [Edgar Allen Poe's] prose is unreadable—like Jane Austin's [sic]. No there is a difference. I could read his prose on salary, but not Jane's. Jane is entirely impossible. It seems a great pity that they allowed her to die a natural death.
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Do good when you can, and charge when you think they will stand it.
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It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
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Kings cannot ennoble thee, thou good, great soul, for One who is higher than kings hath done that for thee but a king can confirm thy nobility to men.
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If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go.
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Experience, the only logic sure to convince a diseased imagination and restore it to rugged health.
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I would have written a shorter letter, but I did not have the time.
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How stunning are the changes which age makes in a man while he sleeps!
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That is a simple rule, and easy to remember. When I, a thoughtful and unblessed Presbyterian, examine the Koran, I know that beyond any question every Mohammedan is insane not in all things, but in religious matters.
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My experience with horses is that they never throw away a chance to go lame.
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... an experienced, industrious, ambitious, and often quite often picturesque liar.
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The more you join with people in their joys and their sorrows, the more nearer and dearer they come to be to you.
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It is best to read the weather forecast before praying for rain.
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Morals are not the important thing-nor enlightenment-nor civilization. A man can do absolutely well without them, but he can't do without something to eat. The supremest thing is the need of the body, not of the mind and spirit.
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Don't wait the time is never just right.
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A person that started in to carry a cat home by the tail was gitting knowledge that was always going to be useful to him, and warn't ever going to grow dim or doubtful.
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In the laboratory there are no fustian ranks, no brummagem aristocracies the domain of Science is a republic, and all its citizens are brothers and equals, its princes of Monaco and its stonemasons of Cromarty meeting, barren of man-made gauds and meretricious decorations, upon the one majestic level!
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I was dead for millions of years before I was born and it never inconvenienced me a bit.
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And how moving is the eloquence of the untaught when it is the heart that is speaking!
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It's lovely to live on a raft. We had the sky up there, all speckled with stars, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss about whether they was made or only just happened.
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