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There is only one good sex. The female one.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Female
Sex
Good
More quotes by Mark Twain
Such is professional jealousy a scientist will never show any kindness for a theory which he did not start himself.
Mark Twain
Peace by persuasion has a pleasant sound, but I think we should not be able to work it. We should have to tame the human race first, and history seems to show that that cannot be done.
Mark Twain
from the beginning of my sojourn in this world there was a persistent vacancy in me where the industry ought to be. (Ought to was is better, perhaps, though the most of the authorities differ as to this.
Mark Twain
Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary.
Mark Twain
Nothing helps scenery like bacon and eggs.
Mark Twain
A friend is someone who stays in when the rest of the world has gone out.
Mark Twain
At 50, a man can be an ass without being an optimist but not an optimist without being an ass
Mark Twain
I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.
Mark Twain
It makes one hope and believe that a day will come when, in the eye of the law, literary property will be as sacred as whiskey, or any other of the necessaries of life. It grieves me to think how far more profound and reverent a respect the law would have for literature if a body could only get drunk on it.
Mark Twain
The political and commercial morals of the United States are not merely food for laughter, they are an entire banquet.
Mark Twain
The only very marked difference between the average civilized man and the average savage is that the one is gilded and the other is painted.
Mark Twain
I could be an idiot, or I can serve in Congress, but I repeat myself.
Mark Twain
A little starvation can really do more for the average sick man than can the best medicines and the best doctors.
Mark Twain
It consists mainly of the storm of thoughts that is forever blowing through one's head.
Mark Twain
Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.
Mark Twain
Don't just sit there and worry. Be proactive. Do something - anything - about what's worrying you so you can gain information, focus and control over the situation. I've suffered a great many catastrophes in my life. Most of them never happened.
Mark Twain
If everyone was satisfied with himself, there would be no heroes.
Mark Twain
Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
Mark Twain
in order to make a man or boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to attain.
Mark Twain
Progressive improvement beats delayed perfection.
Mark Twain
