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When I take up one of Jane Austen's books ... I feel like a barkeep entering the kingdom of heaven. I know what his sensation would be and his private comments. He would not find the place to his taste, and he would probably say so.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
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Kingdom
Book
Kingdoms
Austen
Take
Private
Comments
Feel
Taste
Sensation
Feels
Probably
Jane
Would
Books
Entering
Like
Heaven
Sensations
More quotes by Mark Twain
If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could to-day.
Mark Twain
There ain't anything that is so interesting to look at as a place that a book has talked about.
Mark Twain
It is better to give than receive- especially advice.
Mark Twain
God rewards gamblers and fools. The crucial thing, when you win, is knowing which you were.
Mark Twain
To write without pay until somebody offers pay. If nobody offers pay within three years, the candidate may look upon this circumstance with the most implicit confidence as the sign that sawing wood is what he was intended for.
Mark Twain
It isn't safe to sit in judgment upon another person's illusion when you are not on the inside. While you are thinking it is a dream, he may be knowing it is a planet.
Mark Twain
Drag your thoughts away from your troubles... by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.
Mark Twain
The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopt.
Mark Twain
A powerful agent is the right word. Whenever we come upon one of those intensely right words in a book or newspaper the resulting effect is physical as well as spiritual, and electrically prompt.
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So far as I am able to judge, nothing has been left undone, either by man or nature, to make India the most extraordinary country that the sun visits on his rounds. Nothing seems to have been forgotten, nothing overlooked.
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Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True Religion - several of them.
Mark Twain
The Germans are exceedingly fond of Rhine wines they are put up in tall, slender bottles, and are considered a pleasant beverage. One tells them from vinegar by the label.
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It is my custom to keep on talking until I get the audience cowed.
Mark Twain
Twenty-four years ago I was strangely handsome in San Francisco in the rainy season I was often mistaken for fair weather.
Mark Twain
Some civilized women would lose half their charm without dress and some would lose all of it.
Mark Twain
When a person is accustomed to one hundred and thirty-eight in the shade, his ideas about cold weather are not valuable.
Mark Twain
And so when I couldn't stand it no longer, I lit out. I got into my old rags and my sugar-hogshead again, and was free and satisfied.
Mark Twain
A dozen direct censures are easier to bear than one morganatic compliment.
Mark Twain
Man seems to be a rickety poor sort of thing, any way you take him a kind of British Museum of infirmities and inferiorities. He is always undergoing repairs. A machine that was as unreliable as he is would have no market.
Mark Twain
By and by when each nation has 20,000 battleships and 5,000,000 soldiers we shall all be safe and the wisdom of statesmanship will stand confirmed.
Mark Twain