Quote

The machine has several virtues... One may lean back in his chair and work it. It piles an awful stack of words on one page. It don't muss things or scatter ink blots around.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Virtue
Chairs
Muss
Words
Virtues
Blots
Around
Machine
Stack
Several
Piles
May
Page
Scatter
Back
Awful
Ink
Work
Machines
Lean
Things
Pages
Chair

More quotes by Mark Twain

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I am not interested to know whether vivisection produces results that are profitable to the human race or doesn't...The pain which it inflicts upon unconsenting animals is the basis of my enmity toward it, and it is to me sufficient justification of the enmity without looking further.
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They say that you can't live by bread alone, but I can live on compliments.
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The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.
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Well, Ben Rogers, if I was as ignorant as you I wouldn't let on.
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What do we call love, hate, charity, revenge, humanity, forgiveness? Different results of the master impulse, the necessity of securing one's self-approval.
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Apparently one of the most uncertain things in the world is the funeral of a religion.
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Whiskey is for drinking water is for fighting over.
Mark Twain
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We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any in the world and it's efficiency is only marred by the difficulty of finding twelve men every day who don't know anything and can't read-
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We Americans are the most lavish and showiest and most luxury loving people on the earth and at our masthead we fly one true and honest symbol, the gaudiest flag the world has ever seen.
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Man can seldom - very, very, seldom - fight a winning fight against his training the odds are too heavy.
Mark Twain
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There is no such thing as the Queen's English. The property has gone into the hands of a joint stock company and we own the bulk of the shares!
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Damn these human beings if I had invented them I would go hide my head in a bag.
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The heart is the real fountain of youth.
Mark Twain
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I never can think of Judas Iscariot without losing my temper. To my mind Judas Iscariot was nothing but a low, mean, premature, Congressman.
Mark Twain
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When a man's dog turns against hime, it is time for his wife to pack her trunk and go home to mamma.
Mark Twain
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When majority is insane, sane must go to asylum.
Mark Twain
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[On Dutch flat poetry]: It is too smooth and blubbery it reads like butter-milk gurgling from a jug.
Mark Twain
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The convention missionaries call modesty has no standard, and cannot have one, because it is opposed to nature and reason and is therefore an artificiality and subject to anybody's whim - anybody's diseased caprice.
Mark Twain
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At 50, a man can be an ass without being an optimist but not an optimist without being an ass
Mark Twain
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I was sorry to have my name mentioned as one of the great authors, because they have a sad habit of dying off. Chaucer is dead, Spencer is dead, so is Milton, so is Shakespeare, and I’m not feeling so well myself.
Mark Twain