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Like most people, I often feel mean, and act accordingly.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Accordingly
Often
Feel
Feels
Mean
Like
People

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Often a quite assified remark becomes sanctified by use and petrified by custom it is then a permanency, its term of activity a geologic period.
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Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
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None but an ass pays a compliment and asks a favour at the same time. There are many asses.
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In God We Trust. It is the choicest compliment that has ever been paid us, and the most gratifying to our feelings. It is simple, direct, gracefully phrased it always sounds well - In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true.
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the size of a misfortune is not determinable by an outsider’s measurement of it but only by the measurements applied to it by the person specially affected by it.
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If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could to-day.
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Leaving out the gamblers, the burglars, and the plumbers, perhaps we do put our trust in God after a fashion. But, after all, it is an overstatement. If the cholera or black plague should come to these shores, perhaps the bulk of the nation would pray to be delivered from it, but the rest would put their trust in The Health Board.
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I hope all of us may eventually be together in everlasting peace and bliss -- except the inventor of the # telephone .
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The law of work seems unfair, but nothing can change it the more enjoyment you get out of your work, the more money you will make.
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One mustn't criticize other people on grounds where he can't stand perpendicular himself
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The pause - that impressive silence, that eloquent silence, that geometrically progressive silence which often achieves a desired effect where no combination of words, howsoever felicitous, could accomplish it.
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Writing is easy. All you have to do is cross out the wrong words.
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I begin to see that a man's got to be in his own heaven to be happy.
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This is the year 1492. I am eighty-two years of age. The things I am going to tell you are things which I saw myself as a child and as a youth.
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It is easier to manufacture seven facts out of whole cloth than one emotion.
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A better idea than my own is to listen.
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A sincere compliment is always grateful to a lady, so long as you don't try to knock her down with it.
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You can't reason with your heart it has its own laws, and thumps about things which the intellect scorns.
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Ethical man: A Christian holding four aces.
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One must keep one's character. Earn a character first if you can, and if you can't, then assume one.
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