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Politicians, old buildings, and prostitutes become respectable with age.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Politician
Building
Age
Become
Prostitutes
Respectable
Buildings
Politicians

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[The Bible is] a mass of fables and traditions, mere mythology.
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Creed and opinion change with time, and their symbols perish but Literature and its temples are sacred to all creeds and inviolate.
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Greece is a bleak, unsmiling desert, without agriculture, manufactures or commerce, apparently. What supports its poverty-stricken people or its Government, is a mystery.
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It is higher and nobler to be kind.
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Censorship is telling a man he can't have a steak just because a baby can't chew it.
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If we only had some God in the country's laws, instead of being in such a sweat to get him into the Constitution, it would be better all around.
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Every man is a moon and has a side which he turns toward nobody: you have to slip around behind it if you want to see it.
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Biographies are but the clothes and buttons of the man. The biography of the man himself cannot be written.
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When your opinions start to coincide with those of the majority, it is time to reconsider your opinions.
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If you invent two or three people and turn them loose in your manuscript, something is bound to happen to them -- you can't help it and then it will take you the rest of the book to get them out of the natural consequences of that occurrence, and so first thing you know, there's your book all finished up and never cost you an idea.
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The community is eminently Portuguese - that is to say, it is slow, poor, shiftless, sleepy, and lazy.
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If you tell the truth you do not need a good memory!
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God created war so that Americans would learn geography.
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He was endowed with a stupidity which by the least little stretch would go around the globe four times and tie.
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When a man stands on the verge of seventy-two you know perfectly well that he never reached that place without knowing what this life is - heartbreaking bereavement.
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Ours is the land of the free-nobody denies that-nobody challenges it. (Maybe it is because we won't let other people testify.)
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Really, what we want now, is not laws against crime, but a law against insanity. That is where the true evil lies.
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It makes one hope and believe that a day will come when, in the eye of the law, literary property will be as sacred as whiskey, or any other of the necessaries of life. It grieves me to think how far more profound and reverent a respect the law would have for literature if a body could only get drunk on it.
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If you've got a nice fresh corpse, fetch him out!
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The law of work does seem utterly unfair-but there it is, and nothing can change it: the higher the pay in enjoyment the worker gets out of it, the higher shall be his pay in cash, too.
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