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People who love sausage and respect the law should never watch either being made.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
People
Watches
Watch
Respect
Either
Law
Made
Never
Love
Sausage
More quotes by Mark Twain
You can't reason with your heart it has its own laws, and thumps about things which the intellect scorns.
Mark Twain
It was enough to make a body ashamed of the human race.
Mark Twain
As for the dinosaur - But Noah's conscience was easy it was not named in his cargo list and he and the boys were not aware that there was such a creature. He said he could not blame himself for not knowing about the dinosaur, because it was an American animal and America had not then been discovered.
Mark Twain
The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
Mark Twain
If true, rarely beautiful. If beautiful, rarely true.
Mark Twain
In Marseilles they make half the toilet soap we consume in America, but the Marseillaise only have a vague theoretical idea of its use, which they have obtained from books of travel.
Mark Twain
He had only one vanity he thought he could give advice better than any other person.
Mark Twain
Old habits cannot be thrown out the upstairs window. They have to be coaxed downstairs one step at a time.
Mark Twain
Loyalty to the country always. Loyalty to the government when it deserves it.
Mark Twain
We don't cut up when mad men are bred by the old legitimate regular stock religions, but we can't allow wildcat religions to indulge in such disastrous experiments.
Mark Twain
What is there that confers the noblest delight? What is that which swells a man's breast with pride above that which any other experience can bring to him? Discovery!
Mark Twain
There has been only one Christian. They caught and curcified him-early.
Mark Twain
Heaven is by favor if it were by merit your dog would go in and you would stay out. Of all the creatures ever made (man) is the most detestable. Of the entire brood, he is the only one... that possesses malice. He is the only creature that inflicts pain for sport, knowing it to be pain.
Mark Twain
There is nothing training cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. It can turn bad morals to good it can destroy bad principles and recreate good ones it can lift men to angelship.
Mark Twain
It has always been a peculiarity of the human race that it keeps two sets of morals in stock-the private and the real, and the public and the artificial.
Mark Twain
It may be called the Master Passion, the hunger for self-approval.
Mark Twain
A little more kindness, A little less speed, A little more giving, A little less greed, A little more smile, A little less frown, A little less kicking, A man while he's down, A little more We, A little less I, A little more laugh, A little less cry, A little more flowers, On the pathway of life, And fewer on graves, At the end of the stri
Mark Twain
Jim said that bees won't sting idiots, but I didn't believe that, because I tried them lots of times myself and they wouldn't sting me.
Mark Twain
Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
If you want to change the future, you must change what you're doing in the present.
Mark Twain
