Quote

Man seems to be a rickety poor sort of thing, any way you take him a kind of British Museum of infirmities and inferiorities. He is always undergoing repairs. A machine that was as unreliable as he is would have no market.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Thing
Machine
Repairs
Kind
Machines
Undergoing
Way
British
Infirmities
Always
Market
Infirmity
Would
Sort
Unreliable
Men
Poor
Inferiority
Seems
Museum
Take
Museums
Rickety

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My sister...was an interested and zealous invalid during sixty-five years, tried all the new diseases as fast as they came out, and always enjoyed the newest one more than any that went before my brother had accumulated forty-two brands of Christianity before he was called away.
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I don't speak German well but several experts have assured me that I write it like an angel. Maybe so, maybe so- I don't know. I've not yet made any acquaintances among the angels. That comes later, whenever it please the Deity. I'm not in any hurry.
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The humorous story is told gravely the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.
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The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.
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You can't make a life over. Society wouldn't let you if you would.
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Most of the things I worried about in life never happened.
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There are two things nobody should ever have to watch being made, sausage and laws.
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None but an ass pays a compliment and asks a favour at the same time. There are many asses.
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There are no accidents, all things have a deep and calculated purpose sometimes the methods employed by Providence seem strange and incongruous, but we have only to be patient and wait for the result: then we recognize that no others would have answered the purpose, and we are rebuked and humbled.
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The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it.
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Really, what we want now, is not laws against crime, but a law against insanity. That is where the true evil lies.
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A powerful agent is the right word. Whenever we come upon one of those intensely right words in a book or newspaper the resulting effect is physical as well as spiritual, and electrically prompt.
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Each season brings a world of enjoyment and interest in the watching of its unfolding, its gradual harmonious development, its culminating graces-and just as one begins to tire of it, it passes away and a radical change comes, with new witcheries and new glories in its train.
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If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could to-day.
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One compliment can keep me going for a whole month.
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The Germans are exceedingly fond of Rhine wines they are put up in tall, slender bottles, and are considered a pleasant beverage. One tells them from vinegar by the label.
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When majority is insane, sane must go to asylum.
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In all my travels the thing that has impressed me the most is the universal brotherhood of man-what there is of it.
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When a library expels a book of mine and leaves an unexpurgated Bible lying around where unprotected youth and age can get hold of it, the deep unconscious irony of it delights me and doesn't anger me.
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Do something everyday that you don't want to do this is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.
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