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If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could to-day.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Honor
Higher
Study
Made
Life
Acquiring
Graduated
Ignorance

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Human Beings are the only animals that blush, or need to.
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You can't no more teach what you ain't learned than you can come from where you ain't been.
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Never argue with people who buy ink by the gallon.
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If a spectacle is going to be particularly imposing I prefer to see it through somebody else's eyes, because that man will always exaggerate. Then I can exaggerate his exaggeration, and my account of the thing will be the most impressive.
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Tomorrow night I appear for the first time before a Boston audience - 4000 critics.
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It is better to take what does not belong to you than to let it lie around neglected.
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From the dome of St. Peter's one can see every notable object in Rome... He can see a panorama that is varied, extensive, beautiful to the eye, and more illustrious in history than any other in Europe.
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A group of men in evening clothes looks like a flock of crows, and is just about as inspiring.
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The thing for us to do is just to do our duty, and not worry about whether anybody sees us do it or not.
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You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
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Two days overdue, THE WORLD'S WORK has not reached me. Pray make a note of this. I would rather not have to resort to violence.
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An ecstasy is a thing that will not go into words it feels like music.
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What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.
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I have a religion-but you will call it blasphemy. It is that there is a God for the rich man but none for the poor.....Perhaps your religion will sustain you,will feed you-I place no dependence in mine. Our religions are alike, though, in one respect-neither can make a man happy when he is out of luck.
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Better a broken promise than none at all.
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Marriage -- yes, it is the supreme felicity of life. I concede it. And it is also the supreme tragedy of life. The deeper the love the surer the tragedy. And the more disconsolating when it comes.
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We Americans worship the almighty dollar! Well, it is a worthier god than Heredity Privilege.
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[The Bible is] a mass of fables and traditions, mere mythology.
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The political and commercial morals of the United States are not merely food for laughter, they are an entire banquet.
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Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
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