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Demagogue--a vessel containing beer and other liquids.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Vessel
Corruption
Beer
Drinking
Politics
Liquids
Demagogue
Containing
Liquid

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The conviction of the rich that the poor are happier is no more foolish than the conviction of the poor that the rich are.
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[On Dutch flat poetry]: It is too smooth and blubbery it reads like butter-milk gurgling from a jug.
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It is wiser to find out than to suppose.
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The secret of getting ahead is getting started
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Oh Death where is thy sting! It has none. But life has.
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If you would beseech a blessing upon yourself, beware! lest without intent you invoke a curse upon a neighbor at the same time.
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There are 869 different forms of lying, but only one of them has been squarely forbidden. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor.
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You can't make a life over. Society wouldn't let you if you would.
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Worrying is paying interest on a debt you might not even owe.
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Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else. This is not advice, it is merely custom.
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We find not much in ourselves to admire, we are always privately wanting to be like somebody else. If everybody was satisfied with himself, there would be no heroes
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Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are most economical in its use.
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If horses knew their strength we should not ride anymore.
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The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad.
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As a rule, we go about with masks, we go about looking honest, and we are able to conceal ourselves all through the day.
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Don't you know that the very thing a man dreads is the thing that always happens?
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Better a broken promise than none at all.
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A friend is someone who stays in when the rest of the world has gone out.
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There are people who strictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation. They pay this price for health. And health is all they get for it. How strange it is. It is like paying out your whole fortune for a cow that has gone dry.
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Being rich ain't what it's cracked up to be. It's just worry and worry, and sweat and sweat, and a-wishing you was dead all the time.
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