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When I want to read something nice, I sit down and write it myself.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Something
Nice
Read
Write
Writing
More quotes by Mark Twain
Wisdom teaches us that none but birds should go out early, and that not even birds should do it unless they are out of worms.
Mark Twain
Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growths
Mark Twain
Grown people everywhere are always likely to cling to the religion they were brought up in.
Mark Twain
The house was as empty as a beer closet in premises where painters have been at work.
Mark Twain
If God is what people say there can be no one in the universe so unhappy as He for He sees unceasingly myriads of His creatures suffering unspeakable miseries--and besides this foresees how they are going to suffer during the remainder of their lives. One might as well say, As unhappy as God.
Mark Twain
For all the talk you hear about knowledge being such a wonderful thing, instinct is worth forty of it for real unerringness.
Mark Twain
Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today.
Mark Twain
We Americans worship the almighty dollar! Well, it is a worthier god than Heredity Privilege.
Mark Twain
I saw men whom thirty years had changed but slightly but their wives had grown old. These were good women it is very wearing to be good.
Mark Twain
I speak French with timidity, and not flowingly--except when excited. When using that language I have often noticed that I have hardly ever been mistaken for a Frenchman, except, perhaps, by horses never, I believe, by people.
Mark Twain
Modesty antedates clothes and will be resumed when clothes are no more.
Mark Twain
If smoking cigars is not permitted in heaven, I won''t go.
Mark Twain
A conspiracy is nothing but a secret agreement of a number of men for the pursuance of policies which they dare not admit in public
Mark Twain
In the ancient city of London, on a certain autumn day in the second quarter of the sixteenth century, a boy was born to a poor family of the name of Canty, who did not want him.
Mark Twain
Those who do not read have no advantage over those who cannot read.
Mark Twain
When an honest writer discovers an imposition it is his simple duty to strip it bare and hurl it down from its place of honor, no matter who suffers by it any other course would render him unworthy of the public confidence.
Mark Twain
A railroad is like a lie you have to keep building it to make it stand.
Mark Twain
I came in with Halley's Comet in 1835. It is coming again next year, and I expect to go out with it. It will be the greatest disappointment of my life if I don't go out with Halley's Comet. The Almighty has said, no doubt: Now here are these two unaccountable freaks they came in together, they must go out together.
Mark Twain
Nothing is so ignorant as a man's left hand, except a lady's watch.
Mark Twain
Jane Austen's books, too, are absent from this library. Just that one omission alone would make a fairly good library out of a library that hadn't a book in it.
Mark Twain
