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I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Wonderful
Serene
Four
Superstitions
Belief
Assurance
Observe
Religious
Admire
Faith
Calm
Funny
Confidence
Christian
Humor
Aces

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Nothing is so ignorant as a man's left hand, except a lady's watch.
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They did not know it was impossible so they did it
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Pilgrim's Progress , about a man that left his family, it didn't say why. I read considerable in it now and then. The statements was interesting, but tough.
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The exquisitely bad is as satisfying to the soul as the exquisitely good. Only the mediocre is unendurable.
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The conviction of the rich that the poor are happier is no more foolish than the conviction of the poor that the rich are.
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My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
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The proverb says, Born lucky, always lucky, and I am very superstitious. As a small boy I was notoriously lucky. It was usual for one or two of our lads (per annum) to get drowned in the Mississippi or in Bear Creek, but I was pulled out in a 2/3 drowned condition 9 times before I learned to swim, and was considered to be a cat in disguise.
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I cannot help but notice that there is no problem between us that cannot be solved by your departure.
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To place man properly at the present time, he stands somewhere between the angels and the French.
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Behind every successful man, there is a woman - And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
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Every time I read a Jane Austen novel, I feel like a bartender at the gates of heaven.
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Eight grown Americans out of ten dread the coming of the Fourth, with its pandemonium and its perils, and they rejoice when it is gone-if still alive.
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He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
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I have been born more times than anybody except Krishna.
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Where every man in a state has a vote, brutal laws are impossible.
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No one is sane, straight along, year in and year out, and we all know it. Our insanities are of varying sorts, and express themselves in varying forms-fortunately harmless forms as a rule.
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Names are not always what they seem.
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The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture he will never get a set which can really be depended on 'till a dentist makes him one.
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The rain ...falls upon the just and the unjust alike a thing which would not happen if I were superintending the rain's affairs. No, I would rain softly and sweetly on the just, but if I caught a sample of the unjust outdoors, I would drown him.
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Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.
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