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Two things seemed pretty apparent to me. One was that in order to be a pilot a man had to learn more than any one man ought to learn and the other was that he must learn it all over again in a different way every 24 hours.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Things
Hours
Men
Learn
Order
Pilot
Two
Apparent
Must
Pilots
Different
Seemed
Every
Ought
Way
Pretty

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Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.
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You can't reason with your heart it has its own laws, and thumps about things which the intellect scorns.
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Modesty antedates clothes and will be resumed when clothes are no more.
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When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
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What a good thing Adam had. When he said a good thing he knew nobody had said it before.
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In literature imitations do not imitate.
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What ought to be done to the man who invented the celebrating of anniversaries? Mere killing would be too light.
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Homely truth is unpalatable.
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I felt so lonesome I most wished I was dead. The stars were shining, and the leaves rustled in the woods ever so mournful and I heard an owl, away off, who-whooing about somebody that was dead, and a whippowill and a dog crying about somebody that was going to die.
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Every man has a secret ambition: To outsmart horses, fish and women.
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Armor is heavy, yet it is a proud burden, and a man standeth straight in it.
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What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
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I was warned to stop smoking, which I did, for two or three days, but it was too lonesome, and I have resumed - in a modified way - 4 smokes a day instead of 40. This will have a good effect. On the bank balance.
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He was endowed with a stupidity which by the least little stretch would go around the globe four times and tie.
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We all belong to the nasty stinking little human race, & of course it is not nice for God's beloved vermin to scoff at each other... Oh, we are a nasty little lot-& to think there are people who would like to save us & continue us. It won't happen if I have any influence.
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The proverb says that Providence protects children and idiots. This is really true. I know because I have tested it.
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They do say that when a man starts down hill everybody is ready to help him with a kick, and I suppose it is so.
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The best cure for Christianity is reading the Bible.
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There are no wild animals until man makes them so.
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The minute we get reconciled to a person, how willing we are to throw aside little needless punctilios and pronounce his name right.
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