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In my experience, previously counted chickens never do hatch.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Previously
Chickens
Experience
Never
Hatch
Counted
More quotes by Mark Twain
This is the year 1492. I am eighty-two years of age. The things I am going to tell you are things which I saw myself as a child and as a youth.
Mark Twain
Your actions speak so much louder than words.
Mark Twain
The humorous story is told gravely the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.
Mark Twain
If you would beseech a blessing upon yourself, beware! lest without intent you invoke a curse upon a neighbor at the same time.
Mark Twain
Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate.
Mark Twain
The ordinary chestnut can beget a sickly and reluctant laugh, but it takes a horse chestnut to fetch the gorgeous big horse-laugh.
Mark Twain
Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.
Mark Twain
Temperate temperance is best intemperate temperance injures the cause of temperance.
Mark Twain
Sometimes my feelings are so hot that I have to take the pen and put them out on paper to keep them from setting me afire inside then all that ink and labor are wasted because I can't print the results
Mark Twain
I've dealt with many crises in my life, but few will ever happen.
Mark Twain
India has two million gods, and worships them all. In religion all other countries are paupers India is the only millionaire.
Mark Twain
I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time.
Mark Twain
It's lovely to live on a raft. We had the sky up there, all speckled with stars, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss about whether they was made or only just happened.
Mark Twain
Humor is like a frog if you dissect it, it dies.
Mark Twain
Tomorrow night I appear for the first time before a Boston audience - 4000 critics.
Mark Twain
when you recollect something which belonged in an earlier chapter, do not go back, but jam it in where you are . Discursiveness does not hurt an autobiography in the least.
Mark Twain
I never made a success of a lecture delivered in a church yet. People are afraid to laugh in a church. They can't be made to do it in any possible way.
Mark Twain
Cats are the wildest of the tame and the tamest of the wild
Mark Twain
There is no urge so great as for one man to edit another man's work.
Mark Twain
One must travel, to learn. Every day, now, old Scriptural phrases that never possessed any significance for me before, take to themselves a meaning.
Mark Twain
