Quote

There ain't no way to find out why a snorer can't hear himself snore.

Mark Twain

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Hear
Find
Way
Snore
Snoring

More quotes by Mark Twain

Image
Your road is everything that a road ought to be...and yet you will not stay in it half a mile, for the reason that little, seductive, mysterious roads are always branching out from it on either hand, and as these curve sharply also and hide what is beyond, you cannot resist the temptation to desert your own chosen path and explore them.
Mark Twain
Image
Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.
Mark Twain
Image
I prefer milk because I am a Prohibitionist, but I do not go to it for inspiration.
Mark Twain
Image
The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.
Mark Twain
Image
Yes, always avoid violence. In this age of charity and kindliness, the time has gone by for such things. Leave dynamite to the low and unrefined.
Mark Twain
Image
When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Kentucky, because everything there happens 20 years after it happens anywhere else.
Mark Twain
Image
I admire him, I frankly confess it and when his time is come I shall buy a piece of the rope for a keepsake.
Mark Twain
Image
There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus and upset the convictions and debauch the emotions of an audience not practiced in the tricks and delusions of oratory
Mark Twain
Image
I am dead to adverbs they cannot excite me. To misplace an adverb is a thing which I am able to do with frozen indifference it can never give me a pang. There are subtleties which I cannot master at all - they confuse me, they mean absolutely nothing to me - and this adverb plague is one of them.
Mark Twain
Image
We are all beggars, each in his own way.
Mark Twain
Image
I never made a success of a lecture delivered in a church yet. People are afraid to laugh in a church. They can't be made to do it in any possible way.
Mark Twain
Image
There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact.
Mark Twain
Image
I like Joan of Arc best of all my books and it is the best I know it perfectly well.
Mark Twain
Image
Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
Mark Twain
Image
A man may have no bad habits and have worse
Mark Twain
Image
Thanksgiving day. Let us all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks now, but the turkeys.
Mark Twain
Image
Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growths
Mark Twain
Image
A conspiracy is nothing but a secret agreement of a number of men for the pursuance of policies which they dare not admit in public
Mark Twain
Image
One holds a bottle of red wine by the neck, a woman by the waist, and a bottle of champagne by the derriere.
Mark Twain
Image
It's my opinion that every one I know has morals, though I wouldn't like to ask. I know I have. But I'd rather teach them than practice them any day. Give them to others-that's my motto.
Mark Twain