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I have been cautioned to talk but be careful not to say anything. I do not consider this a difficult task.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Tasks
Careful
Consider
Talk
Difficult
Anything
Cautioned
Task

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I have too much respect for the truth to drag it out on every trifling occasion.
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Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.
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Prophesy is a good line of business, but it is full of risks.
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Pity is for the living, envy is for the dead. Death, the refuge, the solace, the best and kindliest and most prized friend and benefactor of the erring, the forsaken, the old and weary and broken of heart.
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He gossips habitually he lacks the common wisdom to keep still that deadly enemy of man, his own tongue.
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The modern patriotism, the true patriotism, the only rational patriotism is loyalty to the Nation all the time, loyalty to the Government when it deserves it.
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Dates are hard to remember because they consist of figures figures are monotonously unstriking in appearance, and they don't take hold, they form no pictures, and so they give the eye no chance to help. Pictures are the thing. Pictures can make dates stick.
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A good and wholesome thing is a little harmless fun in this world it tones a body up and keeps him human and prevents him from souring.
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Be virtuous and you will be eccentric.
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Low comedies are written for the drawing-room, the kitchen and the stable, and if you cut out the kitchen and the stable the drawing-room can't support the play by itself.
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The humorous story is told gravely the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.
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We write frankly and freely, but then we modify before we print.
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And how moving is the eloquence of the untaught when it is the heart that is speaking!
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I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.
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As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain from smoking when awake.
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