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These are the true and only God, mighty and supreme.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Consumerism
Mighty
Supreme
True

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The frankest and freest product of the human mind and heart is a love letter the writer gets his limitless freedom of statement and expression from his sense that no stranger is going to see what he is writing.
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It's not as bad as it sounds.
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A man can be a Christian or a patriot, but he can't legally be a Christian and a patriot - except in the usual way: one of the two with the mouth, the other with the heart.
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The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but the fly comes close.
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The community is eminently Portuguese - that is to say, it is slow, poor, shiftless, sleepy, and lazy.
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Those who do not read the news are uninformed. Those who do are misinformed.
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Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer. All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.
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They do say that when a man starts down hill everybody is ready to help him with a kick, and I suppose it is so.
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... No photograph ever was good, yet, of anybody - hunger and thirst and utter wretchedness overtake the outlaw who invented it! It transforms into desperadoes the weakest of men depicts sinless innocence upon the pictured faces of ruffians gives the wise man the stupid leer of a fool, and the fool an expression of more than earthly wisdom.
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Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate.
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By and by when each nation has 20,000 battleships and 5,000,000 soldiers we shall all be safe and the wisdom of statesmanship will stand confirmed.
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We regret the things we don't do more than the things we do.
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So far as I am able to judge, nothing has been left undone, either by man or nature, to make India the most extraordinary country that the sun visits on his rounds. Nothing seems to have been forgotten, nothing overlooked.
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No man, deep down in the privacy of his heart, has any considerable respect for himself.
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Optimist: day-dreamer in his small clothes.
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It is higher and nobler to be kind.
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Sacred cows make the best hamburger.
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Those who do not read have no advantage over those who cannot read.
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That is just the way with some people. They get down on a thing when they don’t know nothing about it.
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You can't break a bad habit by throwing it out the window. You've got to walk it slowly down the stairs.
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