Quote

There is not a single celebrated Southern name in any of the departments of human industry except those of war, assassination, lynching, murder, the duel, repudiation, & massacre.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Names
Celebrated
Repudiation
War
Southern
Human
Department
Duel
Humans
Murder
Massacre
Except
Lynching
Industry
Massacres
Single
Departments
Name
Assassination

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You don't know about me, without you have read a book by the name of 'The Adventures of Tom Sawyer,' but that ain't no matter. That book was made by a Mr. Mark Twain, and he told the truth, mainly.
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Do not undervalue the headache. While it is at its sharpest it seems a bad investment but when relief begins, the unexpired remainder is worth $4 a minute.
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Whiskey is carried into committee rooms in demijohns and carried out in demagogues.
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Customs do not concern themselves with right or wrong or reason. But they have to be obeyed one reasons all around them until he is tired, but he must not transgress them, it is sternly forbidden.
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The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
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We are discreet sheep we wait to see how the drove is going, and then go with the drove.
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from the beginning of my sojourn in this world there was a persistent vacancy in me where the industry ought to be. (Ought to was is better, perhaps, though the most of the authorities differ as to this.
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There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact.
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The old Irish when immersing a babe at baptism left out the right arm so that it would remain pagan for good fighting
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To trust the God of the Bible is to trust an irascible, vindictive, fierce and ever fickle and changeful master.
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Humor is the good natured side of a truth.
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I can understand German as well as the maniac that invented it, but I talk it best through an interpreter.
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That is a society editor, sitting there elegantly dressed, with his legs crossed in that indolent way, observing the clothes the ladies wear, so that he can describe them for his paper and make them out finer than they are and get bribes for it and become wealthy.
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All men are ignorant, just on different subjects.
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I like criticism, but it must be my way.
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The most outrageous lies that can be invented will find believers if a person only tells them with all his might.
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The happy phrasing of a compliment is one of the rarest of human gifts, and the happy delivery of it another.
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Circumstance - which moves by laws of its own, regardless of parties and policies, and whose decrees are final and must be obeyed by all - and will be
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We have to keep our God placated with prayer, and even then we are never sure of him-how much higher and finer is the Indian's God...Our illogical God is all-powerful in name, but impotent in fact the Great Spirit is not all-powerful, but does the very best he can for his injun and does it free of charge
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The only people that a bank will loan money to is the very people who don't need it.
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