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My axiom is, to succeed in business: avoid my example.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Business
Axiom
Axioms
Avoid
Succeed
Example

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If you've got a nice fresh corpse, fetch him out!
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Age enlarges and enriches the powers of some musical instruments - notably those of the violin - but it seems to set a piano's teeth on edge.
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I could forgive the boy, now, if he'd committed a million sins!
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I have been on the verge of being an angel all my life, but it's never happened yet.
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There's something in it when a body like the widow or the parson prays, but it don't work for me, and I reckon it don't work for only just the right kind.
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In writing, I shall always confine myself strictly to the truth, except when it is attended with inconvenience.
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If work were so pleasant, the rich would keep it for themselves.
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A banker is somebody who lends you an umbrella & takes it away as soon as it starts raining.
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Many public-school children seem to know only two dates—1492 and 4th of July and as a rule they don't know what happened on either occasion.
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For England must not fall: it would mean an inundation of Russian & German political degradations which would envelop the globe & steep it in a sort of Middle-Age night & slaverly which would last till Christ comes again - which I hope he will not do he made trouble enough before.
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Every time I read a Jane Austen novel, I feel like a bartender at the gates of heaven.
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To be, or not to be that is the bare bodkin That makes calamity of so long life.
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Yes, always avoid violence. In this age of charity and kindliness, the time has gone by for such things. Leave dynamite to the low and unrefined.
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The art of prophecy is very difficult, especially with respect to the future.
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Our lives, our liberty, and our property are never in greater danger than when Congress is in session.
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The minute we get reconciled to a person, how willing we are to throw aside little needless punctilios and pronounce his name right.
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We like to read about rich people in the newspapers the papers know it, and they do their best to keep this appetite liberally fed.
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If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go.
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The country is the real thing, the substantial thing, the eternal thing, it is the thing to watch over and care for and be loyal to institutions are extraneous. . . .
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Eternal rest sounds comforting in the pulpit well, you try it once, and see how heavy time will hang on your hands.
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