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My experience with horses is that they never throw away a chance to go lame.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Away
Never
Lame
Horses
Throw
Horse
Animal
Chance
Experience

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That's the difference between governments and individuals. Governments don't care, individuals do.
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Surely the ass who invented the first religion ought to be the first ass damned
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As a rule we develop a borrowed European idea forward, and ... Europe develops a borrowed American idea backwards.
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The master minds of all nations, in all ages, have sprung in affluent multitude from the mass of the nations, and from the mass of the nation only-not from its privileged classes.
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All our acts, reasoned and unreasoned, are selfish
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Do something everyday that you don't want to do.
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If I were going to construct a God I would furnish him with some ways and qualities and characteristics which the Present One lacks... He would spend some of His eternities in trying to forgive Himself for making man unhappy when He could have made him happy with the same effort and He would spend the rest of them in studying astronomy.
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Education that consists in learning things and not the meaning of them is feeding upon the husks and not the corn
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The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.
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There's something in it when a body like the widow or the parson prays, but it don't work for me, and I reckon it don't work for only just the right kind.
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France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country.
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Duties are not performed for duty's sake, but because their neglect would make the man uncomfortable. A man performs but one duty - the duty of contenting his spirit, the duty of making himself agreeable to himself.
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Don't look at the world with your hands in your pockets. To write about it you have to reach out and touch it.
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Tough times teach trust.
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Armor is heavy, yet it is a proud burden, and a man standeth straight in it.
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Our lives, our liberty, and our property are never in greater danger than when Congress is in session.
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I always did hate for anyone to know what my plans or hopes or prospects were—for, if I kept people in ignorance in these matters, no one could be disappointed but myself, if they were not realized.
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That is a society editor, sitting there elegantly dressed, with his legs crossed in that indolent way, observing the clothes the ladies wear, so that he can describe them for his paper and make them out finer than they are and get bribes for it and become wealthy.
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Wherefore being all of one mind, we do highly resolve that government of the grafted by the grafter for the grafter shall not perish from the earth.
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Data is like garbage. You'd better know what you are going to do with it before you collect it.
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