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My experience with horses is that they never throw away a chance to go lame.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Chance
Experience
Away
Never
Lame
Horses
Throw
Horse
Animal

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What God lacks is convictions- stability of character. He ought to be a Presbyterian or a Catholic or something- not try to be everything.
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I saw men whom thirty years had changed but slightly but their wives had grown old. These were good women it is very wearing to be good.
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God puts something good and loveable in every man His hands create.
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Morals are not the important thing-nor enlightenment-nor civilization. A man can do absolutely well without them, but he can't do without something to eat. The supremest thing is the need of the body, not of the mind and spirit.
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I said there was but one solitary thing about the past worth remembering, and that was the fact that it is past-can't be restored.
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Some of us cannot be optimists, but all of us can be bigamists
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Religion consists in a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain of.
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The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.
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No throne exists that has a right to exist, and no symbol of it, flying from any flagstaff, is righteously entitled to wear any device but the skull and crossbones of that kindred industry which differs from royalty only businesswise-merely as retail differs from wholesale.
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There is a sumptuous variety about the New England weather... In the spring I have counted one hundred and twenty-six different kinds of weather inside of four and twenty hours.
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Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
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There is nothing to be learned from the second kick of a mule.
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Well, my book is written-let it go. But if it were only to write over again there wouldn't be so many things left out. They burn in me and they keep multiplying but now they can't ever be said. And besides, they would require a library-and a pen warmed up in hell.
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There is no salvation for us but to adopt Civilization and lift ourselves down to its level.
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When the world is made to be idiot-proof, the world will become overpopulated with idiots.
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To believe yourself brave is to be brave it is the one only essential thing.
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His ignorance covers the world like a blanket, and there's scarcely a hole in it anywhere.
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Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
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Imagination labors best in distant fields.
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No man, deep down in the privacy of his heart, has any considerable respect for himself.
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