Quote

Where a blood relation sobs, an intimate friend should choke up, a distant acquaintance should sigh, a stranger should merely fumble sympathetically with his handkerchief.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Relation
Sobs
Merely
Handkerchiefs
Friend
Choke
Blood
Acquaintance
Sigh
Distant
Fumble
Intimate
Sympathetically
Stranger
Handkerchief

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Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven.
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A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.
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If you invent two or three people and turn them loose in your manuscript, something is bound to happen to them -- you can't help it and then it will take you the rest of the book to get them out of the natural consequences of that occurrence, and so first thing you know, there's your book all finished up and never cost you an idea.
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The exquisitely bad is as satisfying to the soul as the exquisitely good. Only the mediocre is unendurable.
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Frankness is a jewel only the young can afford it.
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When majority is insane, sane must go to asylum.
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To get the full value of joy You must have someone to divide it with. After all these years I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning it is better to live outside the Garden with her than inside it without her.
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People are much more willing to lend you books than bookcases.
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When politics enter into municipal government, nothing resulting therefrom in the way of crimes and infamies is then incredible. It actually enables one to accept and believe the impossible.
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It's so damned humiliating.
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What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.
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After my marriage she edited everything I wrote. And what is more, she not only edited my works, she edited me.
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I bring you this stately matron named Christendom, returning bedraggled, besmirched, and dishonored from pirate raids in Kiao-Chow, Manchuria, South Africa, and the Phillipines, with her soul full of meanness, her pocket full of boodle, and her mouth full of pious hypocrisies. Give her soap and a towel, but hide the looking-glass.
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A man with a hump-backed uncle mustn't make fun of another man's cross-eyed aunt
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Wisdom teaches us that none but birds should go out early, and that not even birds should do it unless they are out of worms.
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Deep down in me I knowed it was a lie, and He knowed it. You can't pray a lie - I found that out.
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I am the entire human race compacted together. I have found that there is no ingredient of the race which I do not possess in either a small way or a large way.
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Gratitude is a debt which usually goes on accumulating like blackmail the more you pay, the more is exacted.
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If you will notice, there is seldom a telegram in a paper which fails to show up one or more members & beneficiaries of our Civilization as promenading with his shirt-tail up & the rest of his regalia in the wash.
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Intellectual ''work'' is misnamed it is a pleasure, a dissipation, and is its own highest reward.
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