Quote

Damn these human beings if I had invented them I would go hide my head in a bag.

Mark Twain

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Hide
Damn
Beings
Head
Human
Humans
Lecturer
Would
Bags
Invented

More quotes by Mark Twain

Image
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
Mark Twain
Image
Man is the only animal that blushes - or needs to.
Mark Twain
Image
in order to make a man or boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to attain.
Mark Twain
Image
Memories which someday will become all beautiful when the last annoyance that encumbers them shall have faded out of our minds.
Mark Twain
Image
Do not complain about growing old. It is a privilege denied to many.
Mark Twain
Image
Diligence is a good thing, but taking things easy is much more restful.
Mark Twain
Image
It's my opinion that every one I know has morals, though I wouldn't like to ask. I know I have. But I'd rather teach them than practice them any day. Give them to others-that's my motto.
Mark Twain
Image
The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopt.
Mark Twain
Image
I was a-trembling, because I'd got to decide, forever, betwixt two things, and I knowed it.
Mark Twain
Image
These are the true and only God, mighty and supreme.
Mark Twain
Image
My father was a Saint Bernard, my mother was a Collie, but I am a Presbyterian.
Mark Twain
Image
The report of my death was an exaggeration.
Mark Twain
Image
[I] shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes. Indeed, upon second thought, I will not use it then, for it is unchristian, inelegant, and degrading--though to speak truly I do not see how house rent and taxes are going to be discussed worth a cent without it.
Mark Twain
Image
A pessimist is a well-informed optimist.
Mark Twain
Image
A man with a hump-backed uncle mustn't make fun of another man's cross-eyed aunt
Mark Twain
Image
If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat.
Mark Twain
Image
It's an epitome of life. The first half of it consists of the capacity to enjoy without the chance the last half consists of the chance without the capacity.
Mark Twain
Image
The older we grow the greater becomes our wonder at how much ignorance one can contain without bursting one's clothes.
Mark Twain
Image
There ought to be a room in every house to swear in. It's dangerous to have to repress an emotion like that.
Mark Twain
Image
By trampling upon the helpless abroad with unchecked surveillance, Americans have learned, by a natural process, to endure with apathy the like at home.
Mark Twain