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You want to be very careful about lying otherwise you are nearly sure to get caught.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Careful
Caught
Sure
Lying
Nearly
Otherwise
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Courage is not the absence of fear, but the mastery of it.
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I will remark in the way of general information, that in California, that land of felicitous nomenclature, the literary name of this sort of stuff is hogwash
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Dying man couldn't make up his mind which place to go to-both have their advantages, heaven for the climate, hell for the company!
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Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities Truth isn't.
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The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow.
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Human beings seem to be a poor invention. If they are the noblest works of God where is the ignoblest?
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Education that consists in learning things and not the meaning of them is feeding upon the husks and not the corn
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Pity is for the living, envy is for the dead. Death, the refuge, the solace, the best and kindliest and most prized friend and benefactor of the erring, the forsaken, the old and weary and broken of heart.
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Optimist: day dreamer more elegantly spelled.
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If it's your job to eat a frog, it's best to do it first thing in the morning. And If it's your job to eat two frogs, it's best to eat the biggest one first.
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And how moving is the eloquence of the untaught when it is the heart that is speaking!
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There ain't anything that is so interesting to look at as a place that a book has talked about.
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Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.
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The test of any good fiction is that you should care something for the characters the good to succeed, the bad to fail. The trouble with most fiction is that you want them all to land in hell, together, as quickly as possible.
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Yes, even I am dishonest. Not in many ways, but in some. Forty-one, I think it is.
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When a man's dog turns against hime, it is time for his wife to pack her trunk and go home to mamma.
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Never miss an opportunity to shut up.
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An open mind leaves a chance for someone to drop a worthwhile thought in it.
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