Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Sagebrush is a very fair fuel, but as a vegetable it is a distinguished failure. Nothing can abide the taste of it but the jackass and his illegitimate child the mule.
Mark Twain
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Fairs
Illegitimate
Fair
Jackasses
Failure
Mules
Taste
Vegetable
Child
Abide
Nothing
Distinguished
Children
Vegetables
Jackass
Fuel
Mule
More quotes by Mark Twain
Optimist: day dreamer more elegantly spelled.
Mark Twain
The exercise of an extraordinary gift is the supremest pleasure in life.
Mark Twain
Etiquette requires us to admire the human race.
Mark Twain
It is so unsatisfactory to read a noble passage and have no one you love at hand to share the happiness with you. And it is unsatisfactory to read to one's self anyhow - for the uttered voice so heightens the expression.
Mark Twain
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
Mark Twain
The community is eminently Portuguese - that is to say, it is slow, poor, shiftless, sleepy, and lazy.
Mark Twain
The unexamined life may not be worth living, but the life too closely examined may not be lived at all.
Mark Twain
The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.
Mark Twain
English humor is hard to appreciate, though, unless you are trained to it. The English papers, in reporting my speeches, always put 'laughter' in the wrong place.
Mark Twain
It is agreed, in this country, that if a man can arrange his religion so that it perfectly satisfies his conscience, it is not incumbent on him to care whether the arrangement is satisfactory to anyone else or not.
Mark Twain
A dollar picked up in the road is more satisfaction to you than the ninety-and -nine which you had to work for, and money won at faro or in stock snuggles into your heart in the same way.
Mark Twain
God puts something good and loveable in every man His hands create.
Mark Twain
There are two types of speakers: those that are nervous and those that are liars.
Mark Twain
My land, the power of training! Of influence! Of education! It can bring a body up to believe anything.
Mark Twain
I wasn't worth a cent two years ago, and now I owe two million dollars.
Mark Twain
There are too many stars in some places and not enough in others.
Mark Twain
Frankenstein took some flesh and bones and blood and made a man out of them the man ran away and fell to raping and robbing and murdering everywhere, and Frankenstein was horrified and in despair, and said, I made him, without asking his consent, and it makes me responsible for every crime he commits. I am the criminal, he is innocent.
Mark Twain
If all men were rich, all men would be poor.
Mark Twain
The world has corrected the Bible. The church never corrects it and also never fails to drop in at the tail of the procession-and take the credit of the correction.
Mark Twain
You may honestly feel grateful that homeopathy survived the attempts of the allopaths (orthodoxy) to destroy it.
Mark Twain
