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We find not much in ourselves to admire, we are always privately wanting to be like somebody else. If everybody was satisfied with himself, there would be no heroes

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Like
Hero
Somebody
Everybody
Else
Privately
Find
Heroes
Much
Wanting
Always
Admire
Would
Satisfied

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I'm the only person who has ever found the right way to build an autobiography.
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Once you've put one of his [Henry James] books down, you simply can't pick it up again.
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I do not like an injurious lie, except when it injures somebody else.
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It is higher and nobler to be kind.
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It will take mind and memory months and possibly years to gather together the details, and thus learn and know the whole extent of the loss.
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Creed and opinion change with time, and their symbols perish but Literature and its temples are sacred to all creeds and inviolate.
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When some men discharge an obligation, you can hear the report for miles around.
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Fame is a vapor, popularity an accident the only earthly certainty is oblivion.
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God could create the world in six days because he didn't have to make it compatible with the previous version. Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company
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The way it is now, the asylums can hold the sane people, but if we tried to shut up the insane we should run out of building materials.
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Learning softeneth the heart and breedeth gentleness and charity.
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If I'd seen a playwright ever write an' play at the same time, I'd have given 'em more of a chance at cards. Can I get an 'amen?'
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I suppose, just as an honest man in politics shines more than he would elsewhere.
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My idea of our civilization is that it is a shoddy, poor thing and full of cruelties, vanities, arrogances, meannesses and hypocrisies.
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A man may have no bad habits and have worse
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Humor, to be comprehensible to anybody, must be built upon a foundation with which he is familiar. If he can't see the foundation the superstructure is to him merely a freak -- like the Flatiron building without any visible means of support -- something that ought to be arrested.
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One may make their house a palace of sham, or they can make it a home, a refuge.
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It is a time when one's spirit is subdued and sad, one knows not why when the past seems a storm-swept desolation, life a vanity and a burden, and the future but a way to death.
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You can tell German wine from vinegar by the label.
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Thanksgiving day. Let us all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks now, but the turkeys.
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