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When a library expels a book of mine and leaves an unexpurgated Bible lying around where unprotected youth and age can get hold of it, the deep unconscious irony of it delights me and doesn't anger me.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Doesn
Bible
Delights
Around
Mines
Censorship
Book
Mine
Irony
Youth
Unconscious
Deep
Leaves
Expels
Hold
Library
Unprotected
Age
Delight
Censoring
Lying
Anger
Censored

More quotes by Mark Twain

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All the territorial possessions of all the political establishments in the earth--including America, of course-- consist of pilferings from other people's wash. No tribe, howsoever insignificant, and no nation, howsoever mighty occupies a foot of land that was not stolen.
Mark Twain
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Names are not always what they seem.
Mark Twain
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Constellations have always been troublesome things to name. If you give one of them a fanciful name, it will always refuse to live up to it it will always persist in not resembling the thing it has been named for.
Mark Twain
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But in this country we have one great privilege which they don't have in other countries. When a thing gets to be absolutely unbearable the people can rise up and throw it off. That's the finest asset we've got - the ballot box.
Mark Twain
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The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
Mark Twain
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Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
Mark Twain
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Humor is man's greatest blessing.
Mark Twain
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He was such a good man that people hated to see him coming.
Mark Twain
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I like criticism, but it must be my way.
Mark Twain
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When angry, count to four when very angry, swear.
Mark Twain
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Nothing exists but you. And you are but a thought.
Mark Twain
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No man, deep down in the privacy of his heart, has any considerable respect for himself.
Mark Twain
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The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
Mark Twain
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There's something in it when a body like the widow or the parson prays, but it don't work for me, and I reckon it don't work for only just the right kind.
Mark Twain
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I think that the reason why we Americans seem to be so addicted to trying to get rich suddenly is merely because the opportunity to make promising efforts in that direction has offered itself to us with a frequency out of all proportion to the European experience.
Mark Twain
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Drop this mean and sordid and selfish devotion to the saving of your shabby little souls, and hunt up something to do that's got some dignity to it! Risk your souls! Risk them in good causes then if you lose them, why should you care? Reform!
Mark Twain
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Astonishing things can be done with the human memory if you will devote it faithfully to one particular line of business.
Mark Twain
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Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness.
Mark Twain
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All say, ‘how hard it is that we have to die’ -- a strange complaint to come from the mouths of those who have had to live.
Mark Twain
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Next to possessing genius one's self is the power of appreciating it in others.
Mark Twain