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In Marseilles they make half the toilet soap we consume in America, but the Marseillaise only have a vague theoretical idea of its use, which they have obtained from books of travel.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Book
Vague
Marseilles
Make
Travel
Marseille
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Toilet
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Idea
Toilets
Use
Consume
America
Soap
Ideas
Theoretical
More quotes by Mark Twain
I pity the fellow who has to create a dialect or paraphrase the dictionary to get laughs. I can't spell, but I have never stooped to spell cat with a 'k' to get at your funny bone. I love a drink, but I never encouraged drunkenness by harping on its alleged funny side.
Mark Twain
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
Mark Twain
Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
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We called him Barney for short. We couldn't use his real name, there wasn't time.
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Doesn't make any difference who we are or what we are, there's always somebody to look down on.
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My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
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...Man is a marvelous curiosity. When he is at his very very best he is a sort of low grade nickel-plated angel at his worst he is unspeakable, unimaginable and first and last and all the time he is a sarcasm. Yet he blandly and in all sincerity calls himself the 'noblest work of God.'
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Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
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A dollar picked up in the road is more satisfaction to you than the ninety-and -nine which you had to work for, and money won at faro or in stock snuggles into your heart in the same way.
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I speak French with timidity, and not flowingly--except when excited. When using that language I have often noticed that I have hardly ever been mistaken for a Frenchman, except, perhaps, by horses never, I believe, by people.
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There is nothing in the world like persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus.
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America cannot have an empire abroad and a Republic at home.
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There is nothing so annoying as to have two people talking when you're busy interrupting.
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There is this trouble about special providences namely, there is so often a doubt as to which party was intended to be the beneficiary. In the case of the children, the bears, and the prophet, the bears got more real satisfaction out of the episode than the prophet did, because they got the children.
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A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.
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The older I get, the more clearly I remember things that never happened.
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The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
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Travel is lethal to prejudice.
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....try the mustard, - a man can't know what turnips are in perfection without mustard.
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Prophesy is a good line of business, but it is full of risks.
Mark Twain
