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It is at our mother's knee that we acquire our noblest and truest and highest ideals.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Acquire
Knees
Ideals
Highest
Mother
Noblest
Knee
Truest
Motherhood

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My advice to girls: first, don't smoke - to excess second, don't drink - to excess third, don't marry - to excess.
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Old habits cannot be thrown out the upstairs window. They have to be coaxed downstairs one step at a time.
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Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.
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When grown-up persons indulge in practical jokes, the fact gauges them. They have lived narrow, obscure, and ignorant lives, and at full manhood they still retain and cherish a job lot of left-over standards and ideals that would have been discarded with their boyhood if they had then moved out into the world and a broader life.
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They did not know it was impossible so they did it
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But we are all insane, anyway ... The suicides seem to be the only sane people.
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when you recollect something which belonged in an earlier chapter, do not go back, but jam it in where you are . Discursiveness does not hurt an autobiography in the least.
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Figures often beguile me, particularly when I have the arranging of them myself in which case the remark attributed to Disraeli would often apply with justice and force: There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
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I have not professionally dealt in truth. Many when they come to die have spent all the truth that was in them, and enter the next world as paupers. I have saved up enough to make an astonishment there.
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If smoking cigars is not permitted in heaven, I won''t go.
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from the beginning of my sojourn in this world there was a persistent vacancy in me where the industry ought to be. (Ought to was is better, perhaps, though the most of the authorities differ as to this.
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He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
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I like criticism, but it must be my way.
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It is a solemn thought: dead, the noblest man's meat is inferior to pork.
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I haven't a particle of confidence in a man who has no redeeming petty vices whatsoever.
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Praise is well, compliment is well, but affection-that is the last and most precious reward that any man can win, whether by character or achievement.
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