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The lightning there is peculiar it is so convincing, that when it strikes a thing it doesn't leave enough of that thing behind for you to tell whether-Well, you'd think it was something valuable, and a Congressman had been there.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Well
Congress
Enough
Behinds
Thing
Behind
Congressman
Something
Leave
Convincing
Think
Whether
Lightning
Thinking
Tell
Peculiar
Doesn
Strikes
Wells
Valuable

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Love is madness, if thwarted it develops fast.
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God cures and the doctor sends the bill.
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Unused talents gives you no advantage over someone who has no talent at all.
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It's my opinion that every one I know has morals, though I wouldn't like to ask. I know I have. But I'd rather teach them than practice them any day. Give them to others-that's my motto.
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You cant reach old age by another man's road, my habits protect my life but they would assassinate you
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There is no such thing as the Queen's English. The property has gone into the hands of a joint stock company and we own the bulk of the shares!
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We have the best government that money can buy.
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The secret of getting ahead is getting started
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The choir always tittered and whispered all through the service. There was once a church choir that was not ill-bred, but I have forgotten where it was.
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There are no wild animals until man makes them so.
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Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
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The physician who knows only medicine, knows not even medicine.
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Epitaphs are cheap, and they do a poor chap a world of good after he is dead, especially if he had hard luck while he was alive. I wish they were used more.
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In love, you pay as you leave.
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Hardly a man in the world has an opinion upon morals, political, or religion which he got otherwise than through his associations and sympathies.
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Comedy keeps the heart sweet but we all know that there is wholesome refreshment for both mind and heart in an occasional climb among the pomps of the intellectual snow-summits built by Shakespeare and those others.
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But old fools is the biggest fools there is.
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I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.
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Man will do many things to get himself loved, he will do all things to get himself envied.
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The only people who should use the possessive 'we' are kings, newspaper editors, and persons with tapeworms.
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