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If you will notice, there is seldom a telegram in a paper which fails to show up one or more members & beneficiaries of our Civilization as promenading with his shirt-tail up & the rest of his regalia in the wash.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Failing
Tails
Paper
Fails
Rest
Shirt
Show
Seldom
Telegram
Shows
Shirts
Telegrams
Notice
Beneficiaries
Members
Tail
Civilization
Wash
More quotes by Mark Twain
The fear of lightning is one of the most distressing infirmities a human being can be afflicted with. It is mostly confined to women, but now and then you find it in a little dog, and sometimes a man.
Mark Twain
To create man was a quaint and original idea, but to add the sheep was tautology.
Mark Twain
There isn't anything you can't stand if you are only born and bred to it.
Mark Twain
Methuselah lived to be 969 years old . You boys and girls will see more in the next fifty years than Methuselah saw in his whole lifetime.
Mark Twain
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
Mark Twain
There are several kinds of stories, but only one difficult kind-the humorous.
Mark Twain
Laughter is the greatest weapon we have and we, as humans, use it the least.
Mark Twain
Dates are hard to remember because they consist of figures figures are monotonously unstriking in appearance, and they don't take hold, they form no pictures, and so they give the eye no chance to help. Pictures are the thing. Pictures can make dates stick.
Mark Twain
The highest pleasure to be got out of freedom, and having nothing to do, is labor.
Mark Twain
You may say organize, organize, organize but there may be so much organization that it will interfere with the work to be done.
Mark Twain
Creed and opinion change with time, and their symbols perish but Literature and its temples are sacred to all creeds and inviolate.
Mark Twain
Forget and forgive. This is not difficult when properly understood.
Mark Twain
There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable.
Mark Twain
Pilgrim's Progress , about a man that left his family, it didn't say why. I read considerable in it now and then. The statements was interesting, but tough.
Mark Twain
A monarch, when good, is entitled to the consideration which we accord to a pirate who keeps Sunday School between crimes when bad, he is entitled to none at all.
Mark Twain
I should be sorry to think it was the publishers themselves they got up this entire little flutter to enable them to unload a book that was taking too much room in their cellars, but you can never tell what a publisher will do. I have been one myself.
Mark Twain
There is nothing more awe-inspiring than a miracle except the credulity that can take it at par.
Mark Twain
Do one thing every day you don't want to do.
Mark Twain
A tax is a fine for doing well, a fine is a tax for doing wrong.
Mark Twain
When one's character begins to fall under suspicion and disfavor, how swift, then, is the work of disintegration and destruction.
Mark Twain
