Quote

College is a place where a professor's lecture notes go straight to the students' lecture notes, without passing through the brains of either.

Mark Twain

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Place
Passings
Without
Straight
Passing
Notes
Lecture
Students
Lectures
College
Professor
Either
Professors
Brain
Brains

More quotes by Mark Twain

Image
Next you'd see a raft sliding by, away off yonder, and maybe a galoot on it chopping. . . you'd see the ax flash and come down-you don't hear nothing you see the ax go up again, and by the time it's above the man's head then you hear the k'chunk!-it had took all that time to come over the water.
Mark Twain
Image
[On Dutch flat poetry]: It is too smooth and blubbery it reads like butter-milk gurgling from a jug.
Mark Twain
Image
First catch your Boer, then kick him.
Mark Twain
Image
It was enough to make a body ashamed of the human race.
Mark Twain
Image
If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill came always together, who would escape hanging?
Mark Twain
Image
Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.
Mark Twain
Image
We don't cut up when mad men are bred by the old legitimate regular stock religions, but we can't allow wildcat religions to indulge in such disastrous experiments.
Mark Twain
Image
In my experience, previously counted chickens never do hatch.
Mark Twain
Image
The rain ...falls upon the just and the unjust alike a thing which would not happen if I were superintending the rain's affairs. No, I would rain softly and sweetly on the just, but if I caught a sample of the unjust outdoors, I would drown him.
Mark Twain
Image
Rags, wretchedness, poverty and dirt, those signs and symbols that indicate the presence of [Muslim] rule more surely than the crescent-flag itself, abound.
Mark Twain
Image
If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be — a Christian.
Mark Twain
Image
Whiskey is for drinking water is for fighting over.
Mark Twain
Image
We don't care to eat toadstools that think they are truffles.
Mark Twain
Image
The vast majority of the race whether savage or civilized, are secretly kind at heart and shrink from inflicting pain, but in the presence of the aggressive and pitiless minority they don't dare to assert themselves.
Mark Twain
Image
The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
Mark Twain
Image
A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
Mark Twain
Image
Behold, the fool saith, Put not all thine eggs in the one basket - which is but a matter of saying, Scatter your money and your attention but the wise man saith, Pull all your eggs in the one basket and - WATCH THAT BASKET. - Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar
Mark Twain
Image
Circumstances make man, not man circumstances.
Mark Twain
Image
Well, Ben Rogers, if I was as ignorant as you I wouldn't let on.
Mark Twain
Image
The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
Mark Twain