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If you want to change the future, you must change what you're doing in the present.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Future
Change
Must
Present

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I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight.
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The Creator made Italy from designs by Michelangelo.
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Dates are hard to remember because they consist of figures figures are monotonously unstriking in appearance, and they don't take hold, they form no pictures, and so they give the eye no chance to help. Pictures are the thing. Pictures can make dates stick.
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Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.
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Whose property is my body? Probably mine. I so regard it. If I experiment with it, who must be answerable? I, not the State. If I choose injudiciously, does the state die? Oh, no.
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I do love compliments, yet I'm often embarrassed to say what I think to the person when I get a compliment. I so often feel that they have not gone far enough.
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Change is the handmaiden Nature requires to do her miracles with.
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A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditchdigging. It is the insanest of all recreations. The inventor of it overlooked no detail that could furnish weariness, distress, harassment, and acute and long-sustained misery of mind and body.
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Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.
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Surely the test of a novel's characters is that you feel a strong interest in them and their affairs the good to be successful, the bad to suffer failure. Well, in John Ward, you feel no divided interest, no discriminating interest you want them all to land in hell together, and right away.
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I heard a Californian student in Heidelberg say, in one of his calmest moods, that he would rather decline two drinks than one German adjective.
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It is hard enough luck being a monarch, without being a target also.
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We grant God the possession of all the qualities of mind except the one that keeps the others healthy that watches over their dignity that focuses their vision true--humor.
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There has never been a Protestant boy nor a Protestant girl whose mind the Bible has not soiled.
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School gets in the way of my learning.
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One can enjoy a rainbow without necessarily forgetting the forces that made it.
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You are a coward when you even seem to have backed down from a thing you openly set out to do
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Honest poverty is a gem that even a king might be proud to call his own - but I wish to sell out
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There is not a single human characteristic that can be safely labeled as American.
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Thanksgiving day. Let us all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks now, but the turkeys.
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