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I knew a man who grabbed a cat by the tail and learned forty percent more about cats than the man who didn't.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Forty
Cat
Percent
Learned
Knew
Grabbed
Didn
Tail
Men
Tails
Cats

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I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.
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To stand still is to fall behind.
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Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
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To get the right word in the right place is a rare achievement.
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God rewards gamblers and fools. The crucial thing, when you win, is knowing which you were.
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I said nothing of the sort.
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To be satisfied with what one has that is wealth.
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Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.
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Thanksgiving day. Let us all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks now, but the turkeys.
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Between us, we cover all knowledge he knows all that can be known and I know the rest.
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There's a good spot tucked away somewhere in everybody. You'll be a long time finding it, sometimes.
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In the ancient city of London, on a certain autumn day in the second quarter of the sixteenth century, a boy was born to a poor family of the name of Canty, who did not want him.
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And so when I couldn't stand it no longer, I lit out. I got into my old rags and my sugar-hogshead again, and was free and satisfied.
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Frankenstein took some flesh and bones and blood and made a man out of them the man ran away and fell to raping and robbing and murdering everywhere, and Frankenstein was horrified and in despair, and said, I made him, without asking his consent, and it makes me responsible for every crime he commits. I am the criminal, he is innocent.
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The cayote is a living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry. He is always poor, out of luck and friendless. The meanest creatures despise him, and even the fleas would desert him for a velocipede.
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The old Irish when immersing a babe at baptism left out the right arm so that it would remain pagan for good fighting
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By law of periodical repetition, everything which has happened once must happen again and again -- and not capriciously, but at regular periods, and each thing in its own period, not another's and each obeying its own law.
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Be good and you'll be lonesome
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We take a natural interest in novelties, but it is against nature to take an interest in familiar things.
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