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He had the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Christian
Aces
Serene
Gambling
Humorous
Calm
Confidence
Four
Funny

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When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels eat.
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Temperate temperance is best intemperate temperance injures the cause of temperance.
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I don't know anything about this man. Anyhow, I only know two things about him. One is, he has never been in jail, and the other is, I don't know why.
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It is better to be a young June-bug than an old bird of paradise.
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We can secure other people's approval, if we do right and try hard but our own is worth a hundred of it, and no way has been found out of securing that.
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Only he who has seen better days and lives to see better days again knows their full value.
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Conformity—the natural instinct to passively yield to that vague something recognized as authority.
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That is just the way with some people. They get down on a thing when they don’t know nothing about it.
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France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country.
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I try never to let my schooling get in the way of my education.
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The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes.
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God only exhibits his thunder and lightning at intervals, and so they always command attention.
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The Book of Mormon is chloroform in print
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In all my travels the thing that has impressed me the most is the universal brotherhood of man-what there is of it.
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In the real world, nothing happens at the right place at the right time. It is the job of journalists and historians to correct that.
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The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.
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I do not like an injurious lie, except when it injures somebody else.
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If work were so pleasant, the rich would keep it for themselves.
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An American has not seen the United States until he has seen Mardi-Gras in New Orleans.
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A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.
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