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That cat will write her autograph all over your leg if you let her.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
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Autographs
Cat
Legs
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Write
More quotes by Mark Twain
The newspaper that obstructs the law on a trivial pretext, for money's sake, is a dangerous enemy to the public weal. That awful power, the public opinion of a nation, is created in America by a horde of ignorant, self-complacent simpletons who failed at ditching and shoemaking and fetched up in journalism on their way to the poorhouse.
Mark Twain
It was on the 10th day of May - 1884 - that I confessed to age by mounting spectacles for the first time, and in the same hour I renewed my youth, to outward appearance, by mounting a bicycle for the first time. The spectacles stayed on.
Mark Twain
Nothing so focuses the mind as the prospect of being hanged.
Mark Twain
Where every man in a state has a vote, brutal laws are impossible.
Mark Twain
There is nothing training cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. It can turn bad morals to good it can destroy bad principles and recreate good ones it can lift men to angelship.
Mark Twain
He had the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.
Mark Twain
You can tell German wine from vinegar by the label.
Mark Twain
I felt so lonesome I most wished I was dead. The stars were shining, and the leaves rustled in the woods ever so mournful and I heard an owl, away off, who-whooing about somebody that was dead, and a whippowill and a dog crying about somebody that was going to die.
Mark Twain
You need not expect to get your book right the first time. Go to work and revamp or rewrite it. God only exhibits his thunder and lightning at intervals, and so they always command attention. These are God's adjectives. You thunder and lightning too much the reader ceases to get under the bed, by and by.
Mark Twain
It's lovely to live on a raft. We had the sky up there, all speckled with stars, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss about whether they was made or only just happened.
Mark Twain
It's so damned humiliating.
Mark Twain
Time spent with your children is time wisely spent.
Mark Twain
Delicacy - a sad, sad false delicacy - robs literature of the two best things among its belongings: Family-circle narratives & obscene stories.
Mark Twain
Thanksgiving day. Let us all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks now, but the turkeys.
Mark Twain
Every citizen of the republic ought to consider himself an unofficial policeman, and keep unsalaried watch and ward over the laws and their execution.
Mark Twain
It is the will of God that we must have critics and missionaries and congressmen and humorists, and we must bear the burden
Mark Twain
It must be well-nigh a maximum of sense to behave so that one escapes being hanged.
Mark Twain
We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it and stop there lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove lid again and that is well but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.
Mark Twain
A crowded police docket is the surest of all signs that trade is brisk and money plenty.
Mark Twain
The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.
Mark Twain
