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There are too many stars in some places and not enough in others.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Stars
Universe
Science
Others
Enough
Many
Places
Mystery

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If God had meant for us to be naked, we'd have been born that way.
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There are no wild animals until man makes them so.
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Tom said to himself that it was not such a hollow world, after all. He had discovered a great law of human action, without knowing it -- namely, that in order to make a man or a boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to attain.
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Each of you, for himself, by himself and on his own responsibility, must speak.
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I am admonished in many ways that time is pushing me inexorably along. I am approaching the threshold of age in 1977 I shall be 142.
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I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.
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There has been only one Christian. They caught and curcified him-early.
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Pity is for the living, envy is for the dead. Death, the refuge, the solace, the best and kindliest and most prized friend and benefactor of the erring, the forsaken, the old and weary and broken of heart.
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Independence-is loyalty to one's best self and principles, and this is often disloyalty to the general idols and fetishes.
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First catch your Boer, then kick him.
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God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.
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Knowledge becomes wisdom only after it has been put to good use.
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Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.
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Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.
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Rags, wretchedness, poverty and dirt, those signs and symbols that indicate the presence of [Muslim] rule more surely than the crescent-flag itself, abound.
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I have done more for San Francisco than any of its old residents. Since I left there it has increased in population fully 300,000. I could have done more - I could have gone earlier - it was suggested.
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Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.
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Seasickness: at first you are so sick you are afraid you will die, and then you are so sick you are afraid you won't die.
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America cannot have an empire abroad and a Republic at home.
Mark Twain
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There is nothing more awe-inspiring than a miracle except the credulity that can take it at par.
Mark Twain