Quote

My father was a Saint Bernard, my mother was a Collie, but I am a Presbyterian.

Mark Twain

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Collies
Presbyterian
Presbyterians
Bernard
Saint
Dog
Father
Mother

More quotes by Mark Twain

Image
No real estate is permanently valuable but the grave.
Mark Twain
Image
I had longed to be a butterfly, and I was one at last. I attended private parties in sumptuous evening dress, simpered and aired my graces like a born beau, and polkaed and schoisched with a step peculiar to myself - and the kangaroo.
Mark Twain
Image
Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.
Mark Twain
Image
To be a patriot, one had to say, and keep on saying, Our Country, right or wrong, and urge on the little war. Have you not perceived that that phrase is an insult to the nation?
Mark Twain
Image
There ain't anything that is so interesting to look at as a place that a book has talked about.
Mark Twain
Image
But we are all insane, anyway ... The suicides seem to be the only sane people.
Mark Twain
Image
There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.
Mark Twain
Image
Those who say truth is stranger than fiction have wasted their time on poorly written fiction.
Mark Twain
Image
The machine has several virtues... One may lean back in his chair and work it. It piles an awful stack of words on one page. It don't muss things or scatter ink blots around.
Mark Twain
Image
I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.
Mark Twain
Image
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
Mark Twain
Image
I am living a new and exalted life of late. It steeps me in a sacred rapture to see a portrait develop and take soul under my hand. First, I throw off a study - just a mere study, a few apparently random lines - and to look at it you would hardly ever suspect who it was going to be even I cannot tell, myself.
Mark Twain
Image
I have learned that human existence is essentially tragic. It is only the love of God, disclosed and enacted in Christ, that redeems the human tragedy and makes it tolerable. No, more than tolerable. Wonderful.
Mark Twain
Image
Censorship is telling a man he can't have a steak just because a baby can't chew it.
Mark Twain
Image
I can always tell which is the front end of a horse, but beyond that, my art is not above the ordinary.
Mark Twain
Image
I came in with Halley's Comet in 1835. It is coming again next year, and I expect to go out with it. It will be the greatest disappointment of my life if I don't go out with Halley's Comet. The Almighty has said, no doubt: Now here are these two unaccountable freaks they came in together, they must go out together.
Mark Twain
Image
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.
Mark Twain
Image
In all the ages, three-fourths of the support of the great charities has been conscience money.
Mark Twain
Image
Those who do not read have no advantage over those who cannot read.
Mark Twain
Image
Words are only painted fire, a look is the fire itself. She gave that look, and carried it away to the treasury of heaven, where all things that are divine belong.
Mark Twain