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If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill came always together, who would escape hanging?

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Kill
Came
Opportunity
Desire
Together
Always
Hanging
Would
Escape
Integrity

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I have always been rather better treated in San Francisco than I actually deserved.
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I have been on the verge of being an angel all my life, but it's never happened yet.
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Concentration of power in a political machine is bad and an Established Church is only a political machine it was invented for that it is nursed, cradled, preserved for that it is an enemy to human liberty, and does no good which it could not better do in a split-up and scattered condition.
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He wa'n't no common dog, he wa'n't no mongrel he was a composite. A composite dog is a dog that is made up of all the valuable qualities that's in the dog breed-kind of a syndicate and a mongrel is made up of all riffraff that's left over.
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Courage is not the absence of fear, but the mastery of it.
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The funniest things are the forbidden.
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I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.
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For we were little Christian children and early learned the value of forbidden fruit.
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I pity the fellow who has to create a dialect or paraphrase the dictionary to get laughs. I can't spell, but I have never stooped to spell cat with a 'k' to get at your funny bone. I love a drink, but I never encouraged drunkenness by harping on its alleged funny side.
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Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate.
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A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape.
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If you've got a nice fresh corpse, fetch him out!
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The lie, as a virtue, a principle, is eternal the lie, as a recreation, a solace, a refuge in time of need, the fourth Grace, the tenth Muse, man's best and surest friend is immortal
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I always take Scotch whiskey at night as a preventive of toothache. I have never had the toothache and what is more, I never intend to have it.
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I simply can't resist a cat, particularly a purring one.
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